Math is simple.... Alcohol + sex = awkward mornings
Why do foreign ppl try to talk to me! " me no speaky your language"
Naps are how you solve problems
Stop caring what others think
Having shit on your mind is the worst feeling
I don't have time for this immature bullshit anymore.
At this point I don't wanna do anything all weekend except lay in my bed but I know that's not happening
Its all bout the paper $$$
Haven't used twitter in ages feels weird
Stay dedicated, it's not going to happen overnight
the thing about no strings attached is that someone always ends up getting attached
I hate drunk people when I'm sober and sober people when I'm drunk
over thinking gets the best of me..
The Flappy Bird game is BS. How the hell do you expect us to weave that dumbass bird through Mario world?
When I get naked in the bathroom, the shower usually gets turned on.
Sometimes times is the most precious gift.
You know the weed was good when you look in the fridge for snacks and you find your phone in there
My week goes like:
Toke Up Tuesday
That High Thursday
Super Blunt Sunday
Silly humans plants can't be illegal.
Here are the 3 things wrong with Marijuana.
1. Getting caught with Marijuana
3. Running out of Marijuana
A hangover lasts a day, but our drunken memories last a lifetime
I wanna get fucked up tonight
I refuse to fuck around with a fuck around.
Finally, any dude that has a Superman tattoo is most likely superGAY
Facebook is expected to completely die out by 2017
"I don't kiss on the first date" then bitch you don't eat on the first date either
The quickest way to get someone's attention is to no longer want it
Kanye the type of nigga to yell his own name during sex
I learned at a young age to keep my personal life personal. Stay lowkey w/your business cause things get twisted in the mouth of others
You can guess the type of person they are by the company they keep.
It's so cold outside, I accidentally keyed someone's car with my nipples.
Kissing a girl you you actually really like feels better than fucking a sloppy hoe.
Just wanna take a minute to be grateful for everything in my life.