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Meeting Boy
comedy 148,776 followers
Client Comments turned into Posters. My favorite is “This dog is off-brand”. meetingboy.com/post/978323181… via @HurtyWords
Hello. I am not in the office, but I'll get back to you once I return. Cheers! -Godot
Amazon offering Russell Wiley Is Out To Lunch for $1.99 on Kindle for limited time. Here was my review of it: meetingboy.com/post/557990107…
I thought the lady reading every PowerPoint slide was bad, but this guy is reading 5 pages of guidelines on this call. From Word.
Account director quote of the day: “Well, it’s no more awful than last time, so we might as well show the client."
Throwback Thursday: Overhead Projector meetingboy.com/post/488938411… #tbt
What better place to do copy editing than on this 12-person conference call?
Client asked for the new campaign to be "non-threatening and crazy impactful" without any hint that he sees the contradiction.
Cubicles was the ancient Greek philosopher of hating your job.
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I just wiped up a coffee spill on my desk with the company t-shirt they gave us with the new logo. No regrets.
Someday robots will take over and they'll be stuck in 30-minute conference calls that last hours because they keep interrupting each other.
Sorry, Office Depot was out of magic wands this month, so I won’t be able to do 6 weeks of work in 2 days as you asked.
The client requested we write them a campaign for their Facebook page. Only one problem-- they aren’t on Facebook.
🎶 Take me down to the cubicle city where the boss is mean and the pay is shitty 🎶
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Scheduling a half hour meeting with Mr. And Another Thing, are you? Good luck! I'll see you in two hours.
I solve my problems by citing inspirational quotes instead of changing my behavior.
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I’d say you mismanaged this, but that would imply that you attempted to manage it at all.
Sorry, I can't make your meeting. I'm preordering my iPhone 6 at that time.
Oh, please! Don’t tell me “my pleasure” after you had to look up 14 job numbers. There’s no pleasure in that.
I love when I get emails from people who are on the same conference call as me. Proves no one is listening.
No, we're not calling her while she's out having surgery when we could just figure it out ourselves.
I feel like I don’t need a new phone, but if the iPhone 6 has faster internet speeds from the office bathroom, sign me up.
I’ve emailed you three times asking what the meeting was about since the invite had no agenda. You never replied, so I’m not coming.
Can I file a workman's comp claim for headaches from people scrolling up and down the page too many times while screen sharing?
I AM NOT A UTILIZATION TARGET. I AM A PERSON.
I've long suspected this person deliberately sets things to blow up while they're out so it makes them seem indispensible.
It's not the lying so much as that the boss expects me to be in on the lie with him.
The client made us use an emoticon in this ad. The same client who berated us for using a "casual tone" in our first campaign draft.
I have a meeting now to discuss a meeting that I have this afternoon. This is simultaneously not a joke and a huge fucking joke.
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The boss brought in a PowerPoint designer, which is a job you get after you lose your soul in a deal with the Devil I think.
Oh my God! Please tell me you did not just refer to something as "Web 4.0" with a straight face.
Boss asked me to go to a meeting in his place because he had something urgent come up. What was so important? His fantasy football draft.
MT @margeast: Password expires in 10 days. But if I change it now I have to think of one more password per year so I'll wait thx.
How does it take TWO HOURS to train us to fill out an expense report???
I feel like a dark room and a crate of rotting tomatoes would be enough to make people stop boring us with bad PowerPoints.
Sorry, sir, but attending a barbecue at the boss's house seems like the opposite of what Labor Day is all about.
We all have public schedules, and yet somehow I've received 38 emails trying to see when people are free for a meeting.
Coworker opened a Help Desk ticket because he can't watch The Daily Show while at work any more. Gotta admire his nerve!
The boss started using "the sticky bit" when describing a difficult part of a project, apparently unaware of how it sounds.
The client scheduled a meeting for 4:30 before a holiday weekend, but so far The Hague has refused my request to consider this a war crime.
Look, if you're going to call a meeting before 9AM, you damn well better show up on time.
I wonder if this person knows that you can send an email without marking it ***HIGH IMPORTANCE***.
Quote of the day: "It's not the managing by spreadsheet that I hate; it's that it isn't working."
I have 3 voicemails from a guy whose title is "Global Innovations Officer". Sorry, bub, but leaving voicemails is not very innovative.
Getting a cancelled notification for a meeting is the work equivalent of having an orgasm.
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74 emails since Thursday and yet not one decision.
Well, of course I hate WebEx-- it's just a way to let people bore me with their PowerPoint from far away.
Boss didn't have anyone proofread his PowerPoint and just promised the client a "turkey solution" instead of "turnkey". Priceless.
One nice thing about having to work late is you can print your resume without anyone noticing.
Another day of robbing Peter to pay Paul via billable hours.