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Alan Barns
humour 27,762 followers
Dawn is nature’s way of telling you to go to bed.
Constipated people don’t give a crap.
Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
Come to the dark side – we have cookies.
Seem to be more & more "sale pitches". Does that worry you?
If you don't have the strength to continue, I suggest you keep going until you do
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The trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more. -Erica Jong
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Shame on @BBCNews for playing it's part in the ongoing genocide in Gaza pic.twitter.com/hIbYDj0idz
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Choose a job you like and you will never have to work a day in your life. — Confucius
Character is what you are. Reputation is what people think you are.
By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day. — Robert Frost
Biology grows on you.
Beyond each corner new directions lie in wait. — Stanislaw Lec
"If each day is a gift, I'd like to know where I can return Mondays."
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Sometimes I can seem wise. I just think of something stupid and say the opposite
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Questions are just an excuse for not knowing something
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From 2008ish... Slightly Used "Daddy's Home" Comic. "Daddy's Home" archives: facebook.com/pages/Daddys-H… … … … … … pic.twitter.com/Sz8Hnraply
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"Lust is easy. Love is hard. Like is most important." - Carl Reiner
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Don't raise your voice; improve your argument. ~ Desmond Tutu #quote
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Bald guys never have a bad hair day.
Atheists can do whatever the hell they want.
@ABodger Give thanks. Each day holds a unique blessing, you sometimes just need to find it. ty for the follow!! :)
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Yesterday, I promised myself a better tomorrow. Rather cleverly, I was not precise about the date
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Hello, thank you and goodnight to all my new followers. Be safe..