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Zayn
I tried to get @CLGDoublelift and @aphromoo to do the Rush Hour cover. A+ for effort lol pic.twitter.com/ugXied3mhf
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Sir that parking space is reserved for those with disability "Um bro how about DIS ABILITY to find really awesome parking spaces"
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"no rapping tonight" why? "you rap about patrick swayze everytime, it's embarrassing" ok [after one beer] uh oh y'all it's gettin kinda hazy
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honey I dunked on the kids
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Why does Meghan Trainor always look like she's trying to communicate to you with her eyes that she's being held hostage
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THE BOIS ARE BACK IN TOWN (THE BOIS ARE BACK IN TOWN) @kboonew
Fun fun fun. Staying at home. Mowing the yard. Talking to no one. 😄
911: What is your emergency? Me: I love you. 911: Hang up. Me: No you hang up. 911: Stop. Me: This is so us.
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"@rebeccastuartt: when u try to explain one direction drama to ur friend pic.twitter.com/A6XvLE4dlT" me
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*mail man loses letter* Mail Man: omg lol sorry I lost your letter Me: Wtf bro lol Mail Man: lol more like fail man
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" Sandy, you may not have noticed, but I is 100% ma-male." 😏
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Did you bring any girls #collegein5words
Who do you know here #collegein5words
EMINEM: i hate u mom EMINEM'S MOM: ok. what do you want for dinner EMINEM: not spaghetti!!!! STUDIO AUDIENCE: *big laughs*
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Tweet of the year for me I'm done goodbye twitter
Fast and the Faultiest 9: The Rock Saves San Andreas
If someone offered me 1.2 million for my eSports team, I'd take the money. Then I'd buy Dade to be my best friend and we'd hang out a lot.
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When that goat won't stop talking about your sister pic.twitter.com/1dadqBixFp
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John: Suddenly... Paul: I'm not half the man... George: I used to be Ringo: For years I thought Robocop was an Irish guy named Rob O'Cop
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Good thing I've learned to expect nothing from him
What a sad excuse for a dad
Rockets gave up so early
I love life.
All Pacquiao gotta do is say a big word to Mayweather and that nigga will be knocked out out of confusion.
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Nope. Last word said by Floyd tonight, manny bouta to hit him with the spirit bomb.
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*camera cuts to Mayweather's ex girlfriend in Pacmans corner giving him tips*
Faker's not gonna play in this grand final, he's too busy trying out for C9
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I'm still awake
Make that 2.
Yes bartender give me a round of nyquil.
I'm the kind of person who gets Starbucks delivered from down the street...
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