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Matthew Highton
@Kings_CoRe / @kclinformatics handed over Sam with a new robotic head to @MattHighton ! Enjoy his new shows in Scotland @comedynetwork
Retweeted by Matthew Highton
Need an approximately 700 word read about Sleep Problems that is also a plug for my show, course you do: huffingtonpost.co.uk/matthew-highto…
Doing Inception for @ComCineClub after a few bad nights of sleep has made me question everything. AM I DREAMING YOU PRICKS????
A passing child just punched me in the nuts. I can only reason he was some sort of terminator and just destroyed a future leader of mankind.
Luckily it was a freaky cheese dream. Just to be clear,
Last night I had a night terror that a cat got onto the bed and sprayed webbing out of its bum onto my face.
TONIGHT LAST CHANCE to see my Edinburgh preview 19:30 At the Comedy Pub thatthing.in/28th-july-2014/
"Jon, your horse is steel? You'll never ride that thing..." "Shut up and pass me your shot-gun, we've got some cannibals to kill." Cue music
"I'll ALWAYS be there for you Jon Bon Jovi, just right now I need to crawl into the belly of this mutant and get back you're guitar!"
"How did he die Jon?" "He was shot in the heart and I hate to say it but I think you're to blame." "God I love you" "Not now..." Cue Music.
To get over the fact everyone is going to EdFringe a week before me I'm going to pretend I'm in an apocalyptic road movie with Bon Jovi.
My good fried Jerk Norris (@JozNorris) has done a list of Fringe shows, if you need a lot of recommends look here joznorris.co.uk/#!My-Fringe-Re…
Great news on the Godzilla sequal! Ghidorah, Rodan, Mothra. And a Skull Island movie! heyuguys.com/gareth-edwards… Like my childhood remastered!
Just finished doing @ComCineClub prep for the Empire Strikes Back, WHAT A TWIST AT THE END!! The Set Decorator was Michael Ford!!!
So the staff sing to Belle about dinner but then dont let her eat. ITS A MADHOUSE THIS CASTLE!! #BeautyandtheBeast
Also I don't care that she's a feather duster, but that maid - phwoar. Isnt that the message of the film, it doesnt matter she's a duster!
Watching Beauty and the Beast for @ComCineClub never thought about it before but having tea off Mrs Potts is disgusting...