social anxiety is horrible and if you've ever made someone feel this way you're the worst type of person
remember being a little cunt and sending someone this:
if you don't strategically eat your food so that the last bites to go in your mouth are the tastiest, look at your life
cold weather makes me want to hibernate
new clothes will always make me happy
i'm going to eat nothing less than 10,000 calories today
do not worry about what gifts you get today, don't be materialistic, happiness should derive from spending time with close ones💝
me: *wakes up*
cat: merry christmas m8
grow through what you go through
it's my dad's birthday, and he's washing my mum's car... this guy is always doing the most to keep her happy
when you are dead, you do not know that you are dead, all of the pain is felt by others
the same thing happens when you are stupid
there's this brown fluffy cat who occasionally greets me before i go into my house at uni, and it's my only source of happiness
i swear you hear rae sremmurd black beatles everyday
me: oh no i shouldn't eat that
other me: do it
at least america still has a black president
orange is the new black right?
i want to be rich so i can spoil the fuck out of my parents
where was this teacher back in the day
"hey can i have a bite of that?"
do you think the ocean is salty because land never waves back
my milk expires the same day america does
i hate when you're in a queue and the person behind you thinks it's acceptable to make only a centimetre gap between you
is an earthquake on mars called a marsquake?
"Dude chill she said Rawr XD to me first i swear bro"
i hate when you're in a mood because that one particular person isn't giving you their attention
My freshers is going so well, burnt my room down last night 😅z
if u rate impractical jokers i rate u
every time i work at my dads shop, some lady comes in & takes pics of me w/ her ipad, DO U KNO HOW BAIT THAT IS, holding a tv up to snap man
there are twelve black dots at the intersections in this image - your brain won't let you see them all at once