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#QuestionsIWishICouldGoogle where are my favorite shoes at? They've been missing for months. Lol
I have resepect for your lady.... But now I take it all back.
Love at first sight???.... na! More like lust at first sight.
Just because you pour sprinkles on stuff doesn't make them cupcakes!
I remember when I had a twitter problem. #goodtimes
Sometimes I get the urge to text you, but then I hear fat Amy in the back of my mind saying "mmmm, better not".
What's short dark and delicious? ......... -chocolate syrup #yummers
Suck it up buttercup!
Whoa..... the voice in my head has a potty mouth today! #$%@*
Having a great hair day, just waiting for the wind to fuck it up. #OfCourse
I don't work on fridays, I make appearances. #lazymode
It takes 46 muscles to frown,but only 4 to flip them the bird. ;)
Said shut your face you oops baby!, then I was like fuck so am I. Lol #stoops
Shoutout to all the people who are on twitter instead of working. Lol #notjudging
#BestLieEver don't call me, I'll call you! #Buahaha
#BestLieEver na, for real this time I'm not going to eat the ENTIRE pizza!!
#BestLieEver I'm never drinking that much again!!!! #weekendproblems
I am convinced that different people awaken different beasts in you.
Gossiping about your "friend".... Ya maybe y'all shouldn't call eachother "friends" anymore....
There comes a time in your life when you must realize if they gossip about everyone to you, then they're gossiping about you too!!
I often laugh at extremely inappropriate times.Not because Im nervous or anything.....mainly because I think inappropriate things are funny.
keep nagging him I'm sure he'll cave in! Lol #GirlTalk
Johnny manziel, so where do y'all think he'll end up?
Closed minded people should speak with closed mouths.
If y'all like documentaries watch "crazy love"! Guy hires 3 men to throw acid on his girlfriend's face when she trys to leave him. #Netflix
You are beautiful! And none of that "on the inside" crap. On the outside where it counts. #buahaha
I don't know anybody who eats more oatmeal than I do! #yummerz
What The hell do you want a cookie?! Get the hell out of my face! LOL
There is nothing better than being woke up while you're having a nightmare! #relief
Am I the only weirdo who reads her emails everyday? #lameo
i love shopping for home decor always get my best stuff @kirklands
I can tell by the way you park your car that I hate you!
I'm starving Marvin right now!!
Happy wife happy life! Eh maybe lol
I don't by that all yall believe your kids are cute when they're first born, Im sure some of y'all are like shiiiit he better be funny! Lol
Don't buy a expensive freaking Jersey if you're never going to wear it!!! That is all. :)
ALIENS!!!! that is all carry on with your life.
With @MISTRE353 @BuffaloWildWings cuz he owes me a drink and the wings are 60ยข #FATTY
#makesmemad when people think they deserve a explanation on something you did. Umm I don't have to tell you shit!
#makesmemad when I eat all the oreos in the bag! :( #fatty
#HornyHour I didn't know guys had a hour? I thought it was all day. Ha
i've said it before, and I'll say it again, sluts just heal quicker!
LOL she's so mean....... I think I like her
Have you ever slept 15 hours straight?? Well hopefully I'll get to on my days off. #zombie