If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing it is stupid.
Go to university they said.
You'll figure out what you want to do with your life they said
In the game of how long have you been at work, you lose when you check the time.
Early McDonald's keeps the doc away !
April is sooo close I can almost smell my student loan
"procrastinators are able to do 30 minutes of work in 8 hours and 8 hours worth of work 30 minutes before it's due" my life
My childhood home is on rightmove 😵. Sad times.
Just had the most fucked up dream...
Walking from rosslyn park to home at this time is not the one.
Most of my tweets have been coming from a very dark place lately. That's what happens when you forget to pay your electric bill
Why can I not sleep on alcohol anymore !
Always remember: I don’t care.
*doesn't check grades*
*doesn't check bank account*
*pretends everything is ok*
The reduced section in waitrose is a dangerous thing, off egg and cress for life
All I want for Christmas is £10,000
Kesha is secretly John Travolta in disguise... pic.twitter.com/aMCrGlGhjP
The Year 7 money maker starter pack... pic.twitter.com/nFbe7ast9M
This used to cause pain... pic.twitter.com/KHWHP22EgC
Pizza cake is real and you probably need it in your life. pic.twitter.com/n7eK9Ps1sZ
When math was this simple 😒pic.twitter.com/fttDu2RPJ1
Life’s big question: are you really that attractive or is your selfie game just strong
: Clinomania is the excessive desire to lay in bed all day." @MacklemoreBrown
Someone get one a fried egg sandwich and a cup of tea.
Every day since bestival I've remembered my dreams. And they've been vivid... And weird.
retweet if these pancakes are sexier than you pic.twitter.com/bQ5AERgTym
Happy faces Happy places ❇ instagram.com/p/suz1oWKTm8/
As if I woke up at 9 and my stuff still hasn't come !
Can ya tell what it is yet ? instagram.com/p/sSgBbzKTpO/
Mum and dad birthday dance instagram.com/p/sE3GTlqTg4/
Celebrity big brother was on and Gary Busey is on it. this should get real interesting