people think about you about as much as you think about other people, which is to say, rarely
am I a tree cause I am growing in Brooklyn
I find it funny that De Blasio was urging New Yorkers to be safe during the heat wave while so many of his trains operate WITHOUT AC.
As a professor, I always put it in the syllabus: Plagiarism will get you an automatic 'F'. twitter.com/guardian/statu…
: It's police fatally shoot black man. Talk about burying the lede. twitter.com/wsj/status/750…
I know my child murdered someone. But the murder only took a few minutes and it was his first murder and he loves Oreoes... #brockturner
WEATHER. Why are you raining? Don't you know I born 22 moons ago? Can you perk up for me?
Catcall response idea...
Creeper: Hey, baby I wish I was that skirt.
Me: Sounds great! I'd love to wear your skin.
French philosophy: I think therefore I am.
German philosophy: The I primordially posits the not-I.
American philosophy: Got milk?
i love too many people in too many different zip codes
Strategic institutions: take one
She's talking about camping and most of us haven't seen a tree in four years. #Beantheredonethat
Waiting for her to ask the graduates if they found their lobster. #beantheredonethat
Davis' 2 min on the Kingdom was 10000x better than 30 min on boots and lobsters #beantheredonethat
Next year's keynote speaker #BEANtheredonethat
I'm crazy enough to be doing it. 😭twitter.com/davisbcampbell…
The weather matches my mood today. Not ready for big life changes.
"Michelle has not aged a day. The only way you can date her in photos is by looking at me." —@POTUS
Unassailable NYC Excuses:
1) Signing a lease
2) emergency room
3) &*^!&$ MTA
4) won the Hamilton lottery
Today it actually is not too hot, not too cold. All I need IS a light jacket...#illuminatiproven
THERES A WOMAN ON AN AMERICAN BILL?! Not just a coin?! 😪🙏🏽
When u can't miss any more class & you know your paper is getting workshopped by PPE wolves in 8 hours.😩H
When someone tries to correct the subway conductor by saying Houston Street should be pronounced like the city of Houston... Tourists... 🙄
Don't talk about it if you're not going to do it
Typical Thursday at The King's College washingtonexaminer.com/watch-michele-…
These debates got me like #interregnumxii
SBA when Reese brings a counterpoint #interregnumxii
how about instead of a round of applause we have a round of Guinness
There will NEVER be a year where I don't cringe at the questions asked. No matter what or who it is. #OhMyGuinness
"King's will give you things other colleges couldn't!" Like crippling debt. #ohmyguinness
All the freshman around me haven't looked at their phone ONCE. I can't tell if I respect or am disappointed by their behavior. #OhMyGuinness
My pregame choice of Guinness was a rightly-ordered desire for tonight #ohmyguinness
The only way this could be better is if he pulled out a Guinness from behind the podium. #OhMyGuinness
"In Augusta, I used to shine shoes outside a radio station. Today, I own that station. Know what that is? That's black power." -James Brown
Wind advisory=beware the garbage tornadoes that will inevitably hit you with a flying plastic bag.
tfw you're so tired you try to plug your headphones into your coffee
The amount of papers I need to write is equal to the # of corgi Instagram accounts I've followed this week
Increased security in Times Square following #Brussels
attack @MatthewDiebel @USATODAY
Secretary of State John Kerry is sitting a few rows in front of me at Hamilton! There is so much America here I don't know what to do.
just another millennial with an identity crisis
EADLS featured seven languages: Spanish, two native Colombian languages, German, Latin, Portuguese, and English. 😍W
Heartland Daily Podcast - Introducing Michael Hamilton: Heartland's New Research Fellow for... bit.ly/24E8xKr
what if Beyoncé surprise released 17 full albums each with 17 music videos and in each video she referenced 17 different chain restaurants
West Virginia Bill Would Remove Government Reviews of Hospital Prices - The Heartland Institute news.heartland.org/newspaper-arti… #Huntington