Please upgrade your browser to make full use of twiends.   chrome   firefox   ie   safari  
jordyn
Enjoying the break from August heat.
Anxiety: making it impossible to tell the difference between a minor problem and a catastrophe since the development of the frontal lobe!
Retweeted by jordyn
Dog days of summer ☀️
Congrats to Oregon on passing two years of free community college! Every hardworking student deserves access to higher education.
Retweeted by jordyn
Something wicked this way wobbles.
Breaking a toe is the perfect excuse to buy a pimp cane.
Shout-out to all those working today in the service industry!
Retweeted by jordyn
Be nice. Be kind. Be gentle. Or, as ET put it, be good.
Retweeted by jordyn
Obviously someone devoid of any joy in their life.
S’mores Oreos should’ve been called S’moreos. Or S’mOreos. Who’s the bad guy in their marketing team that shut that down?
Here is where gay marriage is now legal. About time.
Retweeted by jordyn
So much of journalism now is just bad college essays.
Retweeted by jordyn
“Don’t fucking flavor profile me, Bro.” -@JaceCarlysle
Monday is for taking flowers home from work.
Way to be consistently perfect, @copelandband.
Today is the day! The official video for "I Can Make You Feel Young Again" directed by @caleglendening... youtube.com/watch?v=4Xt6i_…
Retweeted by jordyn
Dreams DO come true.
Same sex marriage isn't gay privilege. It's equal rights. Privilege would be something like gay people not paying tax. Like churches don't.
Retweeted by jordyn
Lazy yawns. ☝🏼️
Florals for spring. Groundbreaking.
.@AaronMarshMusic You'd break your neck to
Apple: Now we make stupid watches you can't afford.
Retweeted by jordyn
Every novel is a failure. Which is why we keep needing more novels.
Retweeted by jordyn
I don't want to say that buying #ixora for your valentine will definitely get you laid... but it will ABSOLUTELY get you laid!
Retweeted by jordyn
Tax refunds are way less fun when you already know which credit card you're going to pay off. #growingup
Retweeted by jordyn
HOW TO BE A WRITER: 1. Stand alone at parties. 2. Find smiling uncomfortable. 3. Feel simultaneously above and below everyone. 4. Weep.
Retweeted by jordyn
The real shock would be if Harper Lee said it was the second volume of a trilogy.
Retweeted by jordyn
Setting myself up for failure.
If someone tells you that you have great skin, smile and say, "thanks! It's not mine" then just walk away.
Retweeted by jordyn
A sentence I just said aloud: I was 'spoon out your heart' on MySpace before I was 'edge of your seat'. 💁
I wonder what Ben Gibbard is feeling like right now
Retweeted by jordyn
I’m suspicious of people who don’t like dogs, but I trust a dog when it doesn’t like a person.
Retweeted by jordyn
Banksy trades spray can for pencil in #JeSuisCharlie drawing: r29.co/1HUifvG
Retweeted by jordyn
This excellent illustration that is doing the rounds today is not by Banksy but by French cartoonist Lucille Clerc.
Retweeted by jordyn
I wonder what my first sigh of annoyance in 2015 will be about.
Retweeted by jordyn
Then she starts crying at her reflection and I’m like, “Yeah, girl. Me too.”




Twitter Sign-in
We are going to send you to Twitter to authorize twiends.
Please note that we never tweet or follow people without your permission.
Continue