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Jack Whitehall

comedian comedy 1,616,085 followers
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Please someone tell me how I get to host these awards! #smellyBAFTAs pic.twitter.com/1radVJvwt3
Life lesson. When someone asks you at a highland wedding 'would you like some Bucky? (fortified wine) the correct answer is: 'no thank you'
in a cabin with @BenMcG1 (Dave from fresh meat) we have a rule: 2 farts and your out.
My Friday night! On the sleeper train to Inverness for @gregjmchugh wedding tomorrow. Hell yes Mini cheddars and IPA pic.twitter.com/ookl1RIuN2
The disused school we film Bad Education in is always quite creepy but this door in particular is very sinister. pic.twitter.com/BofkZyp0rr
Becks retiring changes nothing I will still go to the hairdresser as I've done since I was 13 and ask him to make me look like David Beckham
#BeckhamRetires "every time I wore the 3 Lions, I was representing every fan that cared passionately about their country" England #legend
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Love Paul Scholes he's so laid back. He makes Andy Murray look like Jim Carrey.
Congratulations to Frank Lampard. He is one of the nicest guys in football. Well done.
Sony Golden Headphones - seven hours left to vote. GORDON's ALIVE! Vote for my @Xfm show here bit.ly/10DUn9y I'll buy drinks RT
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That's right #FreshMeat series 3 is happening kids and here's the script to prove it. Coming to @Channel4 in autumn
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@jackwhitehall I am devestated! This is a "where were you?" moment. Laura Robson has parted company with her coach. #thankyouzeljkokrajan
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How many hours until Alan Pardew 'rules him self out'? #FergieRetires
It must have come as such a shock to all the people that work for him at the club. Poor Howard Webb. #FergieRetires
First JLS now Fergies retiring! How will the black Eyed Peas cope with this!
.@jackwhitehall’s tour is fast selling out. Book your tickets via Unwind to make sure you’re there. bit.ly/JackWUnwind
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Did a nice gig at @topsecretcomedy run gigs every night if your in need of some comedy in your life!
been filming a scene for bad education series 2 in @NandosUK one day I will write an entire series set in a Nandos. #piripiribirdsofafeather
Hitler. Was he born like that? Was it his parents? Did he read too much philosophy. Was it nature or nurture or Nietzsche?
The Big Reunion is coming back! JLS JLS JLS!!!
So Big Reunion is back. If one of the bands is The Smiths it’ll be the most fantastic programme ever made on ITV2
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@bo_bruce: Thanku 4 downloading "Before I sleep"!! #8 on itunes today. Thankyou for sticking by me. dudes po.st/BeforeISleep” bought!
Karakoe highlight of last night had to be between Paul Simon and Whitesnake.
Off to karaoke with @gregjmchugh thinks he's Sinatra. More like Sinitta.
How harsh was that on Masterchef! Im gonna go to Marcus Wareings restaurant and pretend to find a pube in my soup.
It better not split too
Tonight I will wear my JLS condom at half mast.
JLS have split up. I'm gonna force the entire cast and crew of bad education to respect a minutes silence before we start this morning.
Crimson Tide last night Air Force one tonight why is TV not letting me get to bed at moment. I'll just give up of Broken Arrows on tomorrow.
Could one of the Aston villa players do the decent thing and get Van persie to bite them so Arsenal fans don't have to watch him next week.
@atweetbybilly: watched 300 couldn't help think Gerard Butler looks like @jackwhitehall pic.twitter.com/ey64Q38S37” finally a good lookalike!
Newspapers are so sexist endless photos of celebrity's showing 'side boob' never a picture of a man showing 'side ball' watch this space
Baroness Trumpington on newsnight! She's my girl!
All these golfers should be yellow carded for taking their caps of when they celebrate.
When posh people play football in the park, it's gilets for goal-posts.
Paulo Di Canios goal celebration was class. I salute you sir. Actually wait not salute. Pat on the back.
When is Britain's Got Talent going to have a dog that controls a dancing woman on all fours??
All Tiger did is drop the ball wrong. Call that cheating Last time I played golf I used my foot to stop windmill turning then took my shot
Tiger gets 2 shot penalty instead of disqualification. In terms he understands he doesn't have to move out but it's a night on the sofa bed.
I think the lady that sued @Lord_Sugar and lost should have to go work for Stuart Baggs the brand as punishment. a sort of community service
@TheMattDean: @jackwhitehall I'm game.” - we have one taker! The mighty Matt dean!
@jackwhitehall c4 could rerun the big fat quiz of the year...
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blanket coverage of Maggie means it would be a great time to do something terrible and it go un-noticed. Acid midget wrestling party anyone?
I like that Thatchers passing is an excuse to do camp things and pretend its political. I've just bought five tickets to Wicked.
Did you know we're repeating @jackwhitehall's Bad Education on Sunday nights? No? Good thing ep 1 is on iPlayer! bbc.in/TYGSOW
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