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Just completed a 2.38 mi run - Nice 2hr gym session today. Decided to finish it with some sprints as ... rnkpr.com/a9z5jc9 #RunKeeper
Just completed a 2.71 mi run - Today was supposed to be a rest day, but too much on my mind. So I go ... rnkpr.com/a9q2gen #RunKeeper
Just completed a 5.65 mi run - Very painful run. Side stitches and knee pain, today hurt. Rest day t ... rnkpr.com/a9pngl1 #RunKeeper
Just completed a 5.35 mi run - Another great run for the books. Good weather, good time. I gotta sa ... rnkpr.com/a9og0f7 #RunKeeper
Just completed a 2.53 mi run - Awesome speed runs today. Today is beautiful. If I get out of work ea ... rnkpr.com/a9m8a84 #RunKeeper
Just completed a 5.68 mi run - Surprisingly no stops today. Back out here again tomorrow before work ... rnkpr.com/a949lpp #RunKeeper
Handjobs are like Pepsi... Never your first choice but you'll take it anyway
Just completed a 2.54 mi run - Light lil jog hurt like hell. Back at it again tomorrow. rnkpr.com/a900w5t #RunKeeper
Dressing your children in pastel colors on Easter won't not make them dickheads.
Thus Fashion show they are having for the NBA looks awkward as hell
Just completed a 5.54 mi run - 27°F out and I'm shot. Slow time today but I'm trying. So cold my lun ... rnkpr.com/a880k0j #RunKeeper
Just completed a 3.83 mi run - Nice jog tonight. Painless, just cold. Back at it again tomorrow. rnkpr.com/a80h900 #RunKeeper
Just completed a 5.47 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a7vttp7 #RunKeeper
Any chick participating in "No Shave November" will also be a part of "No Dick December"
Just completed a 4.24 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a7qxzu3 #RunKeeper
Just completed a 4.15 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a7pnvcg #RunKeeper
I know I've had enough to drink when I have to concentrate to blink.
If you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter, what do you get?
Pumpkin Pi. It's white girl math.
... I'll show myself out
Just completed a 5.66 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a7lidu6 #RunKeeper
I was at that family reunion for 35 minutes before I finally realized I didn't know anyone & that I was the only Black guy there
Good morning and by that I mean dont talk to me.
I just made myself a sammich', cut it in half and realized... that I don't need a woman.
Wait...... who's, gonna' clean this knife?
Just completed a 5.54 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a7iwary #RunKeeper
You will never be happier than a girl who just discovered her dress has pockets.
If you don't know me by now....I'm a really good stalker.
Just completed a 1.85 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a7b2cj0 #RunKeeper
I've only grown two feet in my life.
I'll show myself out....
I just earned the 'Night Out' badge on @untappd
Wow this is an awesome beer. Wish it wasn't limited edition.... (Mosaic Promise) untpd.it/s/c116848450 #photo
Jokes on you, hot chick at the bar who gave me a radio station's phone number I just won Disney on Ice tickets and a golf umbrella.
Just completed a 5.32 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a794hk2 #RunKeeper
Ate a big healthy salad for lunch, so OBVIOUSLY I'm having an entire pack of Oreos for dessert.
It's all about balance.
..."the later I get here, the quicker this ends" isn't the appropriate answer when your boss asks why you're late
Ladies: be careful out there. Some guys are just in it to get married and have a family with you. Don't be taken advantage of.
Interviewer: How would you describe yourself?
Me: Very responsible.
Interviewer: Great, let me have your résumé.
Me: I forgot it.
Just completed a 2.45 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a7347sn #RunKeeper
A woman asked me for my phone number today and it felt pretty good. Sure it was when I was ordering pizza, but it still counts.
Never forget that we live in a world in which it is easier to get out of a marriage than a mobile-phone contract.
Pretty proud of myself, I got a lot of procrastinating done today
I'm so thankful I found Jesus...
He makes the best burritos.
Just completed a 5.16 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a70rh0k #RunKeeper
Got this new calorie counting app. Each day I go for a new high score.
Just completed a 2.46 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a6z6uhk #RunKeeper
Just completed a 4.15 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a6xc4vw #RunKeeper
If I was told to pick one word to describe myself, I'd go with ” doesn't pay attention to instructions.”
This stuff is good. I like my stouts too. I'd drink again. - Drinking an Imperial Stout by @foundersbrewing
I just earned the 'Newbie' badge on @untappd
Just completed a 5.46 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a6ujqqd #RunKeeper
When someone says "The last thing I'd want to do is hurt you", I'm wondering why they have a list of things to do that includes hurting me.
Just completed a 5.14 mi run with @RunKeeper
. Check it out! rnkpr.com/a6qdtca #RunKeeper