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Answer by @TakeThatPunk to What is the scariest story you have ever heard? It's really disturbing.
My answer to How much did Albert Einstein sleep?
Putting your college picture as your dp because apparently your own picture wasn't enough.
You follow me. I follow you. You unfollow me. I unfollow you. You follow me. I follow you. You unfollow me. I block you. "A Game of Phones"
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Sometimes, when I'm in the shower, I'll position my arm just right and pretend my mutant power is trickling water from my finger tips.
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Sunil Gavaskar : My son is an idiot. Amitabh Bacchan : No, mine is. Pranab Mukherjee : No, mine. Sonia Gandhi : Bitches please.
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Teacher :"We know how you performed in this term.Now, i don't want to finger anyone...." #WeirdThingsPeopleSay #TrueStory
I have a date tonight.....with a slice of pizza and cold beer.Yes,it is just as nice as it sounds.
I'm just glad that the government doesn't know about Game Of Thrones.
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I once tried to be socially active. Worst 15 minutes of my life.
Your face has a lovely shade of photoshopped.
You're handsome but not 'Deported-from-Saudi-Arabia-handsome'
Jaime lannister walking around singing 'Hey,soul sister'.
Religion is popular because it makes you feel good about being stupid
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Nothing says 'I dont take you seriously' like your dog wagging his tail when you are yelling at him.
Its okay to be proud of your good English, but don't be proud of being poor at your mother tongue. Only the scum of the Earth do that
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I wish I had the passion of Congress & BJP twitter loyalists to fight all day. By passion, I meant energy. By energy, I meant faltu time.
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It'd be awkward to see men spraying deodorants on their half naked bodies and women swaying their bodies to it's fragrance in public places!
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In English it's "Grab the Opportunity"..In Hindi it's "Moccachino".
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The problem with guys is they claim to love you even when they don't. The problem with girls is they hide even when they are madly in love.
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If you take the words 'Daaru', 'Gaadi' and 'Kudi' out of Punjabi songs, all you would have to listen to is 'oho x10'.
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When my Bank Balance depresses me, I look at my email spam folder to check the million dollars I have won.
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"The 'pan' is mightier than the sword"- An angry Indian housewife.
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I still remember my first period after all these years. It was history. 2nd period was social studies, 3rd was math, yada yada.
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Matt Hardy was having his dinner at the Kebab Factory. He was Kebab mein Hardy.
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What kinda team name is this 'Mumbai Indians'. Rest of the teams are not Indians? How would it sound Peshawar Pakistanis? #ILP #lulz
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That Awkard Moment when you cannot judge Whether it is a Commercial of a Deodorant or a Condom ..!
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Your mobile phone has more computing power than all of NASA in 1969. NASA launched a man to the moon... I launch pissed off birds at pigs.
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Poured my heart out to someone but apparently people aren't into molten cardiac tissue and the blood that accompanies it.
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RT: My buddy asked me to describe Twitter. I said, we're basically a bunch of idiots that take turns saying the same things over and over.
Friend:Where are you? Me:Just 2 mins away.. *while still at home struggling to put on skinny jeans* #BestLieEver
#BestLieEver I have read the Terms and Conditions.
#BestLieEver Mom,my friends scored even less than me.
Relationship Status : Stop kidding yourself
Me: You just made my day. *talking to pizza*
I wish,i wish I hadn't deep fried that fish.
I'm this close to become the old woman with the cats.*holding her fingers real close*
I can never cheat on my boyfriend.For that i'll first have to find a boyfriend. #ForeverAlone
If you love somebody, let them go.. If they come back, no one wanted them.
I hand people notes that say 'Meet in the park at midnight.' If anyone comes I thank them for having the spirit of adventure. Then kill them
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RT @AwwwwHoney Ze husband: baby, why're you so cute? Me: Maa ne paida kar ne se pehle shayad billi ka baccha kha liya hoga. =) Husband: :|
I'm not addicted to Twitter. I only tweet when I have time: lunch time, break time, off time, this time, that time, anytime, all the time.
Did you know when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown but only 4 to extend your arm and punch them in the face?
Whenever one of my neighbourhood boys have their b'day I give them porn as a b'day gift.Say what you want but i'm getting free wi-fi.
Maybe someday my cat will understand what HD means and then stop crashing his head against the TV everytime I open the Discovery Channel.
If i ever own a bar den i'll name it 'That'.So ppl will be like- Lets go to 'that' bar Which bar? THAT bar! For the love of god which bar?!