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I want you to want me need me crave for me. Go crazy for me.
my relatives: aren't you worried about what boys think about that outfit?
me: boys think?
The older I get, the more I realize what really matters in life.
Whenever anything is slightly going wrong, I need my mom. I'm such a momma's girl.
Is it possible to be a hopeless romantic as well as someone who believes that the chances of finding true love is very slim.
Elon Musk didn't like his kids' school, so he just opened his own.
take pictures of her when she is not paying attention & post them to make sure everyone knows that she is yours.
I have no respect for girls who completely abandon their bestfriend for their boyfriend.
we hold on to the wrong people for so long bc no one ever wants to admit that the person they fell for wasn't who they thought they were
*forgets what i just said while it’s still coming out of my mouth*
i usually start regretting every display of emotion i show about 5 minutes after it's over
I found a bunch of empty condom wrappers in my daughters room, she must be out of water balloons
My daughter just told me that "once you go black, you never go back" I've always thought black can go with any outfit!
It is thought that up to 46% of the Irish population carry the recessive redhead gene.
A smile can hide so much.
If you're going for a run, the jog.fm app will select a music playlist for you based on your pace
I notice everything, sometimes I act like I don't.
My son and his girlfriend are still kids at heart. They still love bouncing up and down on my bed when I'm cooking.
I miss you, but I know you don't care.
Loving someone you don't see everyday is not a bad thing. It's just a proof that love is not in sight but in the heart.
why does everyone care about being mature for their age maybe i like drinking juice boxes and eating popcorn like a lizard fight me about it
why get thinner when you can get more dinner
🌹 🌻 🌷 🌿 🌵 🌾🌼
👖 👖 👖 👖 👖👖 👖
plants wearing pants
Polar bears have a bone inside their penis to strengthen erections, but pollution is causing the bones to weaken to the point of breaking.
“There’s a special place in my heart for the ones who were with me at my lowest and still loved me when I wasn’t very loveable.”
how I talk:
50% a combination of both
paying someone on Craigslist to run me over
relationship status: maybe one day
when attractive people say they are ugly pic.twitter.com/FNlKxKrnBG
RN I want actions not words ~
If you think meeting your girlfriends parents is hard just remember
Someone is going to try to date Eminems daughter.
I heard my daughter tell her boyfriend she wants to eat his banana. I'm so glad she has decided to start eating healthier!
my daughter told me she passed her pregnancy test im so glad i have clever kids
people: you're so quiet, like you don't talk
me: I talk, just not to you
Time decides who you meet in life, your heart decides who you want in your life and your actions decide who stays in your life.
don't do shit that you know damn well you wouldn't want her doing.
bwisit kayo both. Realtalk. Ayoko pumasok💔 sakit tlga sht.
I care about you more than you think.