just finished the tomorrow series and now I don't know what to do with my life so many emotions
I want to make peace with my neighbour after I ran over his dog and shagged his wife , as I need to borrow his drill.
We’re delighted to unveil the magnificent Hogwarts castle model in the snow! #HogwartsAtChristmas pic.twitter.com/aC9LlMIOKN
Beyoncé makes me feel like a potato
I don't really want to know what's good for me
Saw Rudolf wearing a GEEK top so I drop kicked him down the stairs, cunt.
This is so impressive😱 RIP Nelson Mandela�pic.twitter.com/RGtCyLb0LL
I really hope my parents don't find my twitter you know
parents are back with chinese food oh yes
is it weird that I like it when people say my name when they're talking to me?
fuck you you fucking fuck
looks like 90% of the twitter population have taken up fishing as a hobby
: Rip Morgan Freeman ;(” people like you need to fuck off this planet. Have some respect you child.
dosent matter if you have a face like a horse as long as you have your tits out
as much as I try to deny it, I still want people to like me
sometimes I forget how to human
you're gonna need some slug repellent on them eyebrows
why oh why did i just ask that bc i know the answers going to kill me
i swear to god are some people actually joking or are they that dumb
you know you're over someone when you stop stalking their tweets
: am a the only one with no clue who Nelson Mandela is???" yes. yes you are.
What idiot called it a vet instead of a dogtor.
People who become voluntary weather presenters on Twitter. "Windy today".
Thanks for that tit head
"What would effy stonem do?"
oh my god why don't you just put perfection with perfection #lindorbenefitbliss
looking forward to my five day weekend though
Once I read a sloth/my little pony fanfic accidently. It was terrifying.
Put "official" in ur username so all 65 of ur followers know it's the real u
If your names Emma think about it, you drop one M and you might get £30 a week #cleverjoke
Can't believe Love actually was released ten years ago
I've never had carol singers come to my house, it feels like im missing out
'hottest teen 2013' is the reason why I hate Facebook.
It may have been two monthes since your birthday but you best fucking apprieciate the gift ok
made a cheeky milkshake after school pic.twitter.com/MruGDBZbf8
You're kind of being a dick to me for pointing out how much of a dick I am to you
getting slightly addicted to @CWReign
"i'm not a hipster but i can make your hips stir"
i'm not water but i will drown you
No thank you sir, I'm high on life
love when things I've ordered come quicker than they say they will
awwh Tom Daley is such a sweetheart though
When people post a status asking if anyone wants to hang out with them, and no one likes or comments. It just really makes my day, okay?
do you really want to know?
not really sure how my phone can have 0% charge and still be on though
The food for the next eating trial looks disgusting ... #imaceleb #imacelebrity pic.twitter.com/zTEvFjZ60u
telling lads you're a lesbian so they'll piss off