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rt if doris iz da best album evr
Surround yourself with the people who make you better, and you will have better outcomes.
Hoes be like "I'm French" 💁 ...oh really? Where you from, Le Projects?
*girl gets tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh* Girlfriend: Can you hear the ocean? Boyfriend: No bitch but I can smell the fish
Bathroom = Baafrumm , Refrigerator = Fridgerataa , Remote = Moken Troll
On a math test: 2+2 = ?Me: Use calculator just in case
"Be strong." I whispered to my WiFi signal.
When your phone battery is at 1% and your running to the phone charger like "STAY WITH ME BUDDY!! DAMMIT WE'RE LOOSING HIM!!"
Me: Can I have $5? Mom: What happened to the $5 I gave you in 1999?
Black girls with blonde hair looking like a Duracell battery
*Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader*x² + y +8 [(x + 2y ² = a-z] + 2x ³ + (- 2z = 2. 4) + 10y - 5Z ³= k= 9Me: WHEN THE FUCK WE LEARN THIS!
Dad: Why are your eyes so red? Son: I was smoking marijuana Dad: Don't lie to me, you were crying because you're a faggot.
Started from the bottom & you still ain't shit.
Netflix basically has every movie, except for the ones I actually want to watch.
Me: *Breathes*Mom: Watch your fucking tone..
I hate smart ass teachers. Me: Can I go to the bathroom? Teacher: I don't know, can you? Me: BITCH I WILL SHIT ON YOUR DESK.
Stop callin him yo bestie we all know yall fuckin 😒
Fat, single and ready for a Pringle.
I just tied my titties in a bow
My towels are dirty as fuck so I used my titties to wash the dishes
I don't chew my Big Macs I just throw them Bitches in my mouth and swallow.
After I eat my 4 Big Macs, I'ma do 4 sit ups and 4 squats to eliminate the calories.
I enjoy long romantic walks to the fridge.
It's almost time for that "new year new me" bullshit. 😒