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Olov Forsgren
Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and they live for 150 years. Lesson learned.
You should never underestimate the power of your girlfriend. She has the ability to make anything your fault.
The teacher: "Why is it, we some times call our language, mother tongue?" A student: "The father is never allowed to say anything!"
Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.
Living healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which you can die.
Mother told me to be good, but she has been wrong before.
I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.
Being yourself is being the person everyone else wants you to be.
Bacteria is sometimes the only culture some people have.
The artist complained to his friend. "I'm ahead of my contemporaries, not until after my death, the world will... fb.me/7ahKojceR
Unix is user friendly, it is just picky about it's friends.
If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would ever get done.
I would rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
Why are there no romantic restaurants on the moon? There is no atmosphere.
Everyday is a gift, thats why they call it the present.
Why aren't safety pins as safe as they say they are?
If you have ten seconds, watch this cool guy. This is an experiment. fb.me/23TY7QeIX
When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time.
A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.
Love is like heaven but hurts like hell.
Laugh at your problems; everybody else does.
Today's children would be less spoiled if we could spank grandparents!
They say the truth will set you free. But then why is it that every time I tell the truth I get sent to my room?.
Of course there is no reason for it, it's just our policy.
Anger is one letter short of danger.
In a world without walls and fences who needs Windows and Gates?
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
A: I'm in a big trouble! B: Why is that? A: I saw a mouse in my house! B: Oh, well, all you need to do is use a... fb.me/7pLBL6UR2
An atheist is a man who has no invisible means of support.
Drugs cause amnesia and other things I can't remember.
A proverb is a short sentence based on long experience.
The Stock Market always does what you think it will, but rarely when.
Procrastinate now, don't put it off.
Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to.
Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers.
Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Officer: You were speeding. Man: No, I wasn't. Officer: Yes, you were. I'm giving you a ticket. Man: But I wasn't... fb.me/25DmnqAKf
Why do they use sterile needles for lethal injections?
Love is a temporary insanity curable by marriage.
It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.
A wise man makes his own decisions, an ignorant man follows the public opinion.
Living healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which you can die.
A lie travels round the world while truth is putting her boots on.
Mother told me to be good, but she has been wrong before.
A friend's eye is a good mirror.
Tech Support: "O.K. Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in... fb.me/6xMSmibtj
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
What we anticipate seldom occurs; what we least expect generally happens.
A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.