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ΞSP

Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of that dark tunnel...
public account vs private account
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friend: how are things? me: things are good! narrator: things were not good
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Him: Baby are you mad? Me: Typing... Typing... Typing... Typing... Typing... Typing... Typing... Typing... Typing... Typing... No, why?
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R u ever having like a nice chill night and then u decide to casually check up on someone via social media who ruined your life...
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“I’ll do that later” -- is the universal code for “never”.
not to be overdramatic but this is the greatest 2 minutes and 20 seconds of my entire life
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Traffic be like: Gaadi Maruti, attitude Mercedes wala...
Traffic be like: Gaadi Maruti, attitude Mercedes Walambe
There's no 'I' in Team, but there's meat.
should i flirt or send memes?
Strange, how a ping from an old friend holds more meaning than an electric toothbrush (even though the latter is more useful).
Can't wait, Aamchi Mumbai! :) fb.me/8vCpqW3nT
Am plagued by the big existential questions. You know, like What's my purpose? & What does it all mean? Are we here on Earth to fart around?
except dosa. everyone loves dosa! twitter.com/a_bit_too_much…
Discussing Rape Threats - @absolutelydanny - a very intelligent comedy! Kudos! youtu.be/n5PZMNx8JFI
To clarify, we have absolutely no intention of going to war with Spain. It's the only country left who'll let us go there on our holidays.
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punishments for culprits who do not respect the sanctity of cows > punishment for culprits who do not respect women.
“If you want an audience, start a fight.” - Irish proverb
Common sense eluded me for a moment. Now I'm stuck with a man purse. Man bag?
I have this theory. One person's happiness is directly proportional to his doppelganger's sadness. How else can you justify this existence?
I did something stupid. The rest is YouTube history.
Everyone deserves to find someone who makes them feel like your phone was at 1% and you just found a socket to plug in.
Relationship status: Sometimes I shave just one leg and pretend the hairy one is my boyfriend's under the blanket...
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3D printer, but prints real edible cakes. #FirstWorldShowerThoughts
Weather be like...
Don't just ping me that you miss me. Tell me, you're outside with coffee and donuts. #ActionsSpeakLouderThanWords
HAHAHA twitter is too much
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Muffins, you say. Oh! That's so old fashioned - meet Cruffin Ferrero!
Bad news travels at warp speed. Apparently, good news is still figuring how to get on the freaking camel!
Everyone is your best friend as long as the requisites of friendship confirm to their agenda.
That one phone number which you can't risk to forget but also can't save because you don't want them to see your whatsapp dp. 😂
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It's hard to be sad when there's cupcake on the table.
Half of what I post out here is meaningless bullshit, but I do it so that the other half may reach you.
mood be like: wanna pack my bags and just whisk off somewhere...
War is war, but killing a man at a wedding? As if men needed more reasons to fear marriage. #GameOfThrones
weather be like...
FYI, a woman is not written in braille - you don't have to touch her to know her.
The hotel didn't find it funny when we told them we couldn't find our room..
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You go girl! And let no one tell you otherwise.. 😂twitter.com/oxymoronic_me/…mfb.me/101LLek97v
Harshit got no chills😂😂Yqz
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You go girl! And let no one tell you otherwise.. 😂twitter.com/oxymoronic_me/…m
The mouth should have three gatekeepers. Is it true? Is it kind? And is it necessary?—Arab Proverb artwork by Daryl Toh
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If you are not Khalid Masood, you are NOT responsible for the attacks at the Parliament in London. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise!
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Everytime my life sucks, my inner Toni Braxton sings, 'Unsuck my life...' Moments later, it still sucks.
I whisper to myself...hang in there, mate. This is LIFE.
With great power comes great freedom to not give a shit and just enjoy your #MorningChai and cookies! #TGIF.
 
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