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Ebadul Islam
If you think a minute goes by really fast, you've never done the plank.
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"Welcome to Newvic, home to AS failures" literally take anyone who's failed.
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@Shannxo i think u should concentrate on growing some tits instead of speaking about football... Ur a girl.. Stay in ur lane..
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BREAKING: Sky Sources: @VfL_Wolfsburg say deal for Kevin De Bruyne to join @MCFC could be completed in the next 24 hours. #SSNHQ
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Tyler Blackett will go to Celtic on a season-long loan. #MUFC
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When your parents embarrass you because they want to show off in front of their friends 😒�Md
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Regardless of what everyone thinks, we would like to thank Jonny Evans for his services and wish him all the best at West Brom. #mufc
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Louis van Gaal's dream striker signing is Robert Lewandowski. [mark ogden via @Malachians]
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Good Luck to Jonny Evans, who is signing for West Brom.
Racist mum jailed for covering black neighbour with flour and telling her 'you are white now' mirr.im/1q9M28G
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I hope twitter never removes the 140 character limit. Gonna be too many people writing 10 PAGE ESSAYS about shit nobody cares about.
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Still can't stop laughing at the fact someone accepted this as a fiver in work
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"@missgemcollins: Friday night tanned and ready to parddyyyy have fun " You look like you just escaped a house fire
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#mufc is delighted to announce the signing of @BSchweinsteiger from Bayern Munich on a 3-year contract. #WelcomeBasti
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#mufc is pleased to announce Matteo Darmian has completed his transfer from Torino. More: bddy.me/1NWO6hq
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#mufc has reached an agreement with Bayern Munich to sign Bastian Schweinsteiger. More: bit.ly/1L5xBjZ
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#mufc is delighted to announce that @Memphis has completed his transfer from PSV Eindhoven. #WelcomeMemphis
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The fee for Bastian Schweinsteiger was £6.5 million! Bargain! #mufc
Thought I'd got off the mark last night. What do you all think about video technology in football. Yes or no?
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Just bought an Arsenal season review off eBay. There was no disc but the picture of RVP celebrating against us. Cunt.
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Man City even have empty seats at the Champions League draw 😂�Qy
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"I'm still doing my gcses but i aint shook yano" LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
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Walt dies in breaking bad Michael dies in prison break and him and Linc aint brothers Dexters sister dies Cece is A Have a good day
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.@SchneiderlinMo4 "We are Manchester United and we’re not scared of anyone." #MUFC
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DONE DEAL: Bayer Leverkusen have signed Kevin Kampl from Borussia Dortmund on a 5-year deal for an undisclosed fee.
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SOCIAL: @SpursOfficial confirm the signing of Heung-Min Son from @bayer04fussball on a five-year deal. #SSNHQ
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Here's how much money the top six European leagues have spent this summer. No surprises to see the PL on top. #SSNHQ
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BREAKING: Everton confirm they have rejected transfer request from John Stones #SSNHQ
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Driving instructor: let's see your parallel parking Me:
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Wtf is thiss twitter ads shit
Notification icons now circle, the blue looks electric fancy or what
That is a nice draw, back to holland as well! Looking forward to it! Now watching @AFCAjax hope they get a good result over there! #MUFC
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How the fuck do you jump out of a pool???
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Well well @PSV, guess we'll see each other soon😉👊#CL#CL
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I really like our chances, @ManUtd has a great chance to win this group. #UCLdraw
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Delighted to have signed for @BurnleyOfficial A football environment I cannot wait to be a part.
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@GaryMurg We might be crap. We may well be really over rated but at least we don't have to live in Burnley!
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New twitter update. No more 140 character limit on DM's




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