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Hey dude, I hate everything you do but I'm trying really hard to not hate you. Hating you won't make you suck any less
The older I get the more articulate I am at whining
Mugshots built from DNA data dlvr.it/5BmLgn
: A woman's loyalty is tested when her man has nothing.. A man's loyalty is tested when he has everything.."
I think you deserve much more than a smoke a 50 cents, you deserve to be self sufficient and buy your own cigarettes
Never disclose your personal thoughts to others unless necessary. Adopt the rule that people are on a "need to know" basis. #IMHO
despite the contradictory advice circulated in the late ’90s, if you wanna be my lover, please do not get with my friends
Why are the people of twitter so whiny and insecure?
Sometimes you have to take a deep breath & remind yourself that you wouldn't look good in prison clothes and just smile & walk away.....
what doesn’t kill you leaves you lying awake at 2am wishing it had
bitches who can run in heels should be feared
Stop the double speak! Tell the truth! This IS a war on women! #fem2
"Don't be yourself. Be someone a little nicer." - Mignon McLaughlin #quote
We lost the calendar so long ago so we count the days by the bottles on the floor
May our only occupation be not having a job, may the only cocktails that we make be molotov
My love for you is 98% pure but the 2% that remains has fried the circuits in my brains
"Your candle loses nothing when it lights another." - @drmchitwood
And smoking is like hiring a hitman for $5 a day, and as cool as that is I don't want to keep dying this way
Won't be praying for you so don't you be praying for me #devilmakesthree
tonight I bake my madness a birthday cake, because even the insomniacs aren't awake #johnnyhoboandthefreighttrains
Please RT & share MT @Guttmacher
Help us combat misinformation around women who obtain #abortions
. #RoevWade #Roe
New drinking game, drink when someone says something! #30Rock
You've pretty much exhausted all employment options when you're the 'self-appointed' doorman at 'Al's Midnight Liquors'
"Will you still be my friend if I take naked pictures for money?" #shitspykesays
love is a weird thing like
you just pick a human and you’re like yes i like this one i’ll let this one ruin my life forever
"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are." - Anais Nin
And just like James I'll be drinking Irish tonight #againstme
If you drink enough, your brain just starts photoshopping people.
if she doesn't buy you a PS4 or Jordan's for Christmas it's because she bought her side nigga both
cancel my subscription because I am DONE with ur issues
i silently mouth the words "what the fuck?" at least 20 times a day
Remember when Jamie Foxx said Miley Cyrus would end up on a stripper pole and he had to apologize. Everyone now owes Jamie Foxx an apology
You have morals…how retro of you.
A woman's loyalty is tested when her man has nothing.. A man's loyalty is tested when he has everything..
Smoking is like hiring a hitman for $5 a day, and as cool as that is I don't want to keep dying this way.
Fuck the law cus real jail is for suckers! I go to country club prison you dumb motherfuckers I am the 1% bitch
At least in hell, there's rock and roll and aint no Jesus Christ
Before we learn our lesson let's see how bad things can get #johnnyhoboandthefreighttrains
I painted a banner for our annual family picnic, but my Mom thought "Celebrating 100 Years of Undiagnosed Mental Illness" was inappropriate.
The only people you should try to get even with are the ones who helped you .
Night birds just announced two West coast tours!
Girls Do you want to get thinner?
Go to the paint department of your local hardware store.....