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Akshay Chawdhry
Listening to Hans Zimmer music gives me hope.
[dentist interrupts funeral] "He is dead because he didn't floss"
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[Hospital front desk] "Yeah my wife is here for weight loss surg-" *wife hits me* "Baby delivery, I mean she's here to deliver a baby"
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Just bought an Asus Rog 15.6" laptop. It looks SICK!
Finally have been able to log back into my twitter account :D
Going back to the motherland! See you soon New York/New Jersey
Followers didn't go down at all in Instagram. #LikeABoss
Finally Pakistan take some strong step to strike &Finish Terrorism.Mumbai accused,Laskhar terrorist Zaki Rehman Lakhvi gets bail by PakCourt
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J.K. Rowling states that Voldemort cannot love because he was conceived under the effects of a Love Potion instead of real love.
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Hahahahahahahahaha :) RT @Perspective_pic: Sorry but this may be the best restaurant review ever
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YOU DAWWWWG! RT "@WhatTheFFacts: C.S. Lewis had a secret long-term affair with his best friend's mother."
First final over. Econ was good. Now on to the others. But first, #FIFA time!
With all this talk of #Santa, let's not forget about the Holiday Armadillo
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So I have my Econ final tmrw. 14 chapters are coming. What am I doing? Procrastinating by tweeting and playing fifa.
3 points, clean sheet... That's what you can call "a good weekend!" :-)
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Great movement and passing by the Blues. Great goal! #chelsea
Great to see Costa score. Definitely the hardest working player on the pitch. #chelsea
This is Nervy only being 1-0 Hull still in the game. Need to be more Ruthless.Costa is out of form atm,Hope he gets one in the 2nd Half.
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Can't wait to be reunited with this adorable little thing 😙 @suethebee_
Happenings at the Admissions Office. #NYU
This is how you rock a hijab.
.@PetrCech makes his first Premier League start of the season and he's been speaking ahead of today's game. #CFC
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There are times whenyou thinkonly one person will understand you. But that person misunderstands you the most.
The person you care about the most has the power to make the happiest, or the saddest.
FACT: John Obi Mikel is now just 75 goals away from overtaking Lionel Messi's Champions League goal scoring record.
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My anaconda don't want none unless you speak parseltongue, hun.
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I thought "congo" would be the stupidest slang I'd come across.That was before "bae". Possibly the most annoying way to describe a loved one
Everyone knows how to make babies, but few know how to make good parents.
Can't wait to be done with accounting from tomorrow. Have to say, NOT my favorite thing.
Frost's Road Not Taken's "different road which made all the difference" was him being sarcastic and saying everything sucks regardless.
Only a couple of weeks until I'm back home!
My music life cycle: discover a new song, play it a million times, dl other songs from the genre, get sick of it, discover something else.
Umm no. Still on top of the table. "@Footy_Jokes: Chelsea fans right now.."
José was laughing after the game, I guess he was just waiting for a defeat. Never mind. Still on top, a good performance & as always #KTBFFH
Perhaps luck was a little down and not on our side, but fair play to Newcastle for capitalizing on their opportunities. #NoMoreInvincibles
How has this face not made it on a meme by now? "@CuteOverloads:"
That moment inbetween Netflix episodes when you see your reflection on the black screen and wonder what the fuck you're doing with your life
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India has an extensive road network of 4.86 mn kms - the second largest in the world #MakeInIndia
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If Modi has a iota of respect for the post he occupies, he should publicly apologise to Manmohan for the lie that MMS never visited Nagaland
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Officer: Sir, are you aware how fast you were going? "Well my snapchat selfie says 65 mph..." Officer: omg add me
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And there goes Southampton's "attempt at top 4 finish". They're going to gst pummeled from now on. #BPL
Trying to juggle 3 jobs, college, homework, clubs and taekwondo all at the same time.
That's the way I roll bitches. "@XSTROLOGY: A horny #Virgo will simply drop their pants and say "It's time.""
Dat ass tho... #Thanksgiving