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Heather B. Armstrong

Thinking about running with us? Here's why @dooce loves being part of our team & why you'll love it too: @RunTeamEMC
Retweeted by Heather B. Armstrong
The team @everymomcounts has 15 spots left in the @nycmarathon on 11/5. Join them! My experience from 2011 is here:
"A three-hour lunch won’t kill your business. Dinner at 10:30 PM isn’t a bad idea. Bread is good for you."…
Wherein I am interviewed by the lovely @offscreenmag who graciously didn't ask me about fucking money:…
The most important legacy of Parks and Rec is being able to send this gif around to your friends when you're sick to get sympathy.
Retweeted by Heather B. Armstrong
This gospel version of Reclaiming My Time by @mykalkilgore deserves a Grammy
Retweeted by Heather B. Armstrong
The charges against me in a French court will read, "Attempted to eat someone's baby," and I will be guilty:
There is one point I need to drive home in this post. Listen to *that* part. The rest of this post is just trash.
Think I've found my favourite ever GIF
Retweeted by Heather B. Armstrong
Parles-vous more slowly? Gracias! Bah oui!…
Wherein I leave a yelp review for losing your virginity: "FIVE STARS. Best way to roast the broomstick. Must try.”…
Happy 4th of July to all. I'm forever grateful my immigrant family was welcomed to America 47 years ago. We will never stop giving back.
Retweeted by Heather B. Armstrong
Some dude standing bewildered at the stacked-to-the-nines-buffet in the @Delta lounge at JFK: "I'll have to stop at Burger King, I guess."
Remember if it wasn't for gay people there'd be no Jay-Z. 🏳️‍�5K
Retweeted by Heather B. Armstrong
there's no better image to represent all of America right now than a few enjoying the things that belong to the many.
Retweeted by Heather B. Armstrong
"I don't think people voted for this" says someone on Morning Joe. This is exactly what people voted for. This.
Retweeted by Heather B. Armstrong
In which I get to talk about my favorite book of the year so far and some other, ahem, revelations:…
In which I go overboard for the sake of my child's self-esteem, in partnership with #TheHouseMovie out 6/30 #ad
Today’s protip: Always make small talk with the person driving the car. Especially in Montenegro:…
The next best solution to my hatred of shopping since @ivonnatinkle isn't my live-in sister wife:… @FabFitFun
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