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IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING NICE TO SAY, come sit by me and we can make fun of people together.
That awkward moment when you're actually telling the truth, but you're laughing so everyone thinks you're lying.
I’m really good at stuff until people watch me do that stuff.
The awkward moment when someone you hate thinks their opinion is relevant to your life.
My haters only have one advantage over me. They can kiss my ass, I can't.
Me: "Hola! Como estas? :)" Spanish guy: *Speaks mad fast Spanish* Me: "Dude, chill! Dora didn't teach me that yet!"
I need you. I want you. I love you.... Food
If karma doesn't hit you, I gladly will.
Once you have learned to love, You will have learned to live.
Dude, she just called you Mexican... Oh hell no, hold my taco
me during the summer: is today wednesday or sunday ?
When you first joined Twitter you never thought it would be this addictive.
I have to sleep with a blanket no matter how hot it is.
We all have a friend who never has a clue of what's going on.
"You look tired" = Nice way of saying that you look like shit.
I'm such a bad friend when it comes to communication like if you don't try to contact me you won't hear from me for months at a time
Probably the worst thing about being a penguin is after youre in an argument you'll try to waddle away angrily but still look adorably cute.
i have no motivation to finish this school year
Are you guy's finding and looking for a wholesale mortgage jobs? get it right here right now. syndicatemortgages.com/career
If you can retweet this with your bottom lip then you're a good kisser.🙅 ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
I hate it when people text me 'K', I'm rarely in the mood to talk about Potassium.
Reasons to get out of bed: Food
Is it rude to throw a breath mint into someone's mouth while they are talking?
Text me when you're bored and I'll ignore it like I'm busy.
Dear math, You have too many X's so stop being a player and choose one.