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kara cohen
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Japanese tea gardens pt 2
Japanese tea garden with @temnete
Hung out with bison today
You're never alone when you have captives tied up in your basement.
Sorry not sorry is a logically unsound and paradoxical assertion.
tweeters never win.
I ordered and ate three types of mcchickens last night and I regret nothing. Was actually the highlight of my evening.
Shut up and eat your mcgibbon
❤️@lulumichell
in case anyone's wondering, dying your hair a crazy color doesn't make your life any less meaningless.
Martinis and fries with @OfficialWiccan @SohoGrandHotel life is perfect .
That moment when you realized that you're reading an article titled, "8 Things You Might Wanna Know About Khloe Kardashian"
Liberal Arts Graduate Realizes He’s Already Forgotten 90% Of Human Condition onion.com/1DSWcoc pic.twitter.com/POA7UonqHf
Retweeted by kara cohen
I'm almost certain my office is haunted. So I'm going to hold a seance to see if they'll do my work for me.
I meant "Spice World" I'm such a poseur.
"Because you watched Spice Girls" is a category on my Netflix
Who else feels personally insulted by Gap's new tagline? #DressNormal
If something I worked on is featured on @Upworthy, i'm pretty much guaranteed into heaven, right? I assume that's how it works.
it's highly sharable viral content that will drive high engagement among your fans. #FrenchFries
life is just one big game of Candy Crush.
charlie Chaplin once entered a Charlie Chaplin look alike contest and lost. #CruelWorld
obsessed with Poolside's cover of Harvest Moon. youtu.be/vneabb5ihDs
**It can't be something objectively gross or really expensive.
Tell me what to order on seamless, I will order that thing and take a picture of it. and tweet it back to you.
Whatever size iPhone 6 you get, it turns out to be designed to perfectly fill the hole in your soul where human emotions normally go.
Retweeted by kara cohen
New app. upload a photo and we'll Burnify it. Then you don't have to actually live in the desert for 7 days like an animal.
Is there an unbaby.me for burning man pcitures?
Facebook doesn't think I'm very smart. Must be all the typos. pic.twitter.com/pCFmofzqAI
Fuck banana flavored Runts.
"Is that a west coast thing?" A response to an explanation of Furries.
Chez Cohen/Seeger
Keep forgetting to rub in my parents face that wasting all that time on the internet in high school is what got me jobs.
Ten dollar juices, @soulcyle, gel manicures....It's official, I've gone over to the dark side #sushi #basicbitch
My future child's favorite animated movie series "Land Before Selfies"
Title of my new book: "The Power of Positive Drinking"
Trying to convince my parents to get two french Bulldogs and name them, Simone de Bulldog and Jean Paul Bulldog.
"Nothing matters" is a phrase that paradoxically terrifies and comforts me
Retweeted by kara cohen
"Do they have one baby jesus? You’ll have three." My job is absurd.
"We probably shouldn't actually break into people's houses." #Advertising
Had the sudden worry that if I died today my last tweet to to have #bronies in it.