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D4N13L AJY$I
582 followers
Twitter is a great excuse to talk to your self without looking stupid.
Friend: Omg, your parents are so nice! You: It`s because you`re here...
When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's cute. I just find it strange how many people have knives on a date
ʇǝǝʍʇ sıɥʇ pɐǝᴚ oʇ ǝuoɥd ᴚnoʎ uᴚnʇ oʇ ǝʌɐɥ ʇupıp noʎ ɟı ʇǝǝʍʇǝᴚ
The awkward moment when you pretend die infront of your sister…and she kicks you and walks of,What would she do if i was really DEAD!
Mum : Your room is a filthy mess! Me : My room is not a mess,It's an obstacle course designed to keep me fit.
$250 dollars for a Drake ticket? Just hold on we're staying home.
romeo & juliet (2013) j: lol where r u romeo r: wana come over? j: cant r: y? j: idk parents r: lets kill ourself j: lol k r: swag j: swag
Child : Mom, I love you ! Mom : I love you too :) Teenager : Mom, I love you ! Mom : Yes, what do you want ? -.-
"Mom, look!".... "that's nice sweetie".... "Oh that's so cool how you saw without looking..."
That awkward moment when you're at a friend's house, and their parents start screaming at them & you're just like...that's a nice wall
Hiding your favorite food from the rest of your family
I'm trying to make a Miley Cyrus joke but it's not twerking!
Sleep is my drug. My bed is my dealer. My alarm is the cops. School is the jail.
roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad i'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you
Good times + Crazy friends = Amazing memories.
Balloons are so weird... "happy birthday, here's a plastic sack of my breath
Sorry, I can't hangout. My aunts cousin's sister in law's best friend's insurance agent's roommate's pet goldfish drowned. It was tragic. :(
Y.O.L.O fam Shout out to ma homie Duke Larbie Hes got some mad skills #RealTalk
Who invented hugs? I mean the first hug would have been so awkward. "What are you doing? Why are you holding me??" "Shhh just trust me"
I don't care how old I am. If I lose my Mom in the supermarket I will panic. #RealTalk
I like how Ninja turtles wear masks, good way to hide your identity. It's not like you're a giant turtle or anything.
Why can't a bike stand on its own? Because it's two-tired!