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C. Michael Shuman

Your parents in 1996: Don't trust ANYONE on the Internet. Your parents in 2016: Freedom Eagle dot Facebook says Hillary invented AIDS.
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We've got ✨three✨new shows coming: @undoneshow @HomecomingShow and @crimetown Listen to the trailers and subscribe!
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.@mcmansionhell McMansion awfulness on a scale of 1-10?
Get pumped! The Buddy System trailer is HERE! RT and we will maybe send you a little DM...…
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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Trump could become President, The bees are dying.
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Q for college presidents: How would you explain to students that this is not your position? #SafeSpacesAreDangerous…
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Is this the president we want for our daughters?
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This one video has brought me more joy than I thought possible.
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As much as this culture touts individuality and self-expression as the greatest right, conformity is their highest virtue.
Amzn is willing to pay ppl who arent currently getting paid & we are 2 have fear over “emplymnt rights.” wait what?
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.@MyFHOrlando Summer Town Hall, discussing FH mission, goals, culture. #FHOIgnite
I love leaving here when it's dark out. @MyFHOrlando
.@RideSunRail I've called requesting to know when the 1006 Sanford tracks will be blocked-8:00 and I missed my train
Dogs are tough. I’ve been interrogating this one for hours and he still won’t tell me who is a good boy.
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You're going to say to me, Mr. Trump, we're tired of winning! There's too much winning!
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Homemade sushi for dayz. @ Sanford, Florida
In this world, we must be mindful of the persisting and dangerous assault on transcendent ontology and teleology.
So sad to see that @GarryShandling has died. I spent many hours watching his stand-up and The Larry Sanders Show.
Senator @RandPaul tweeted a mixtape for @HillaryClinton, who spent $90,000 for her own, and it's kind of :fire:
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My favorite thing about being on an airplane is how you can chew ice and it not annoy people.
Give me cornbread when I'm hungry, corn whiskey when I'm dry. Pretty women standing round me when I'm living, God and his angels when I die.
.@albertmohler I've defended you on twitter before and I'm a Libertarian, so...
There's just something about rye and vermouth that goes together so dang well. #cocktails
FBI to Moleskine: "You have to give us access to users' writings! It's for national security! " Different how? If they could, they would.
They call it a tramp stamp. This is public knowledge, right? So why is that still an acceptable tattoo location?
You can now listen to podcasts on @Spotify. Happy birthday to me.
I voted for @CaseyNeistat in the #ShortyAwards because they’re my favorite internet human…
FH team just won the MGH Disparities Leadership Program Award for the class of 2015-2016!!!
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Wow. The U.N. is urging nations to allow disabled people to be killed, precisely because they are disabled.…
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Sorry man on the train LOUDLY complaining about his Obama-phone: "What does a person have to do for a better phone?" I yelled "work."
The 2010s are a weird time where we have to politely let our friends do multi level marketing at us & then pretend we're still friends after
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"I'm sorry officer, but my cell phone does not 'ping' off local towers." #handyAlibis
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“No one remembers who came in second.” - Walter Hagen
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Of all the things to be creeped out about with Ted Cruz, I'm finding the 2 watches thing to be the most unsettling
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Trump voters were decidedly low energy tonight.
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As a man who idolizes ratings, if you're president, will you promise to quit if your approval ratings are low?…
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Rubio rose like a neo-con Phoenix from the ashes of his terrible campaign. But still no one cares.
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