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Chad Shapiro
forget about Chris Rocks SNL monologue already? think Louie didn't plan this set for publicity? I say Like/don't like move on. But shut up
LalalalLalalal I can't hear you. Me avoiding posts about mad men finally. #haventseenit #bingewatching this weekend. #stockpile
Hey, Internet! Can we stop shaking our heads? Have you ever shook your head at something in real life? Are you 80yrs old? #smh #bitchslap
WHEN YOU SET YOUR CAR ALARM WHILE IN FRONT#cars #funny #CarAlarms #shopping #drivingproblems #chadshapiro #indoorhusband #Comedy #scaredcam - via #VineBox
Tom Brady had to deflate his balls, how else would they fit into his cup? #TaDa!! #thridgradejokes #indoorhusband #tweetsbychad
My mom is not on Facebook. That's why she's the best of them all.
Going on an audition today. Scripted with leeway to improv. My favorite type.
Watched #hottubtimemachine2 while in a hot tub. When it was over. It was 1hr 33min into the future. #spooky #timetravel #indoorhusband
Tonight 10:15pm show I'll be performing at Stand Up NY. Great way to end my trip. LA I'll see you soon.
Metro warning is code red for urine levels in the subway today. Ride w/ caution #nycsubways #MTA #indoorhusband
Just picked up a spot at Stand up NY for tonight's show. Very cool of them to throw me on.
Yeah so I stopped watching the daily show years ago. A muppet can host wouldn't matter to me. Unless it's fozzie, he's got jokes #wakawaka
Tonight at 7:30pm Broadway comedy club. 53rd between 8 and 9th.
My life is like the TV show the Goldbergs. This state of the art camcorder records on VHS tapes was mine since I was 13.
Tonight I'm @LICDevil 9pm show $15 cover with Allan Finn. Check it out.
You know you can delete comments on your page? Why write back?Erase it like it never happened. #hurtfulwords #indoorhusband #tips
I won 3 gold medals with this. Il yes that is the official Huffy Thunder Scamp #huffy #bike #champion
How about stores in Chelsea & W. Hollywood can refuse business based on your religious practice? #indianabill #Indiana #LGBT #indoorhusband
I'll say this once, you are all crazy and no one cares. Also half the people disagree with you. #enjoysocialmedia #indoorhusband
Fun show at the Chaplin house. Thanks for letting me work out some stuff.
You're blind, you can't see, gotta wear sun glasses like DMC. Closing arguments at Suge Knight trial. #SugeKnight #rundmc #indoorhusband
Yes, of course blind people should be allowed to drive. How else would you beat a murder charge. #SugeKnight #selfdefence
Yo, Can I Run something over you?, I meant by you? #SugeKnight #imblind #indoorhusband
Hey people. Stop asking me to wait for it and just edit your videos to the good part. I just saved everyone 1,000 hours #indoorhusband
I know bacon. I think you know I know bacon #johnpinette
Tip: if someone says something stupid. Just say "$1 Bob" and walk away. #indoorhusband #tips #guidetolife
In my quest to acquire more energy & points on a iPhone game I'm pretty sure I'm facebook friends w/ at least 3 terrorists. #indoorhusband
When I asked #lenardnemoy, how did you survive after Star Trek? Answer "I Vulcan neck pinch bitches for their riches". #originalgangsta
Did I miss the trend? #lenardnimoy nope there's the blue arrow.
I don't see blue, black, gold,white only shades of grey. 50 shades. the dress is pulled over your head like in hockey & blind folding. #sexy
Park bar tonight in burbank. Comedy as usual 10pm. Start laughing now.
Kicking it old school "you can do it, put your back into it" & that's when I hurt my back. I couldn't do it. #indoorhusband #tweetsbychad
If I walked 20mi/day to work. I would be applying for jobs along the way. & selling water,flowers, oranges to cars passing by.#indoorhusband
You can't break the Internet cause it's already broken. No one agrees with anything. Even this tweet. #indoorhusband #tweetsbychad
Fat Tuesday. I got the snacks ready. #MardiGras2015 #FatTuesday
Just read the Alaska version of 50 shades of grey. It's called "50 words for snow" Just as exciting. #tweetsbychad #indoorhusband #50Shades
NYC i miss your customer service. fast ,correct, & to the point. i think sunshine affects the brain. #nyattidude #sunbrain #indoorhusband
Holy crap heisenberg came out to see the show. #breakingbad
Since Bruce Jenner became a woman. His driving skills went down hill. #brucejenner #sorryitsfunny #jkladies #stereotypejokenotmybelief
Everyone stop your complaining. Brian William's career will be ok. Wait I meant the news anchor next to him will be ok. #BrianWilliams
I'm in New Mexico and the gift shops want to sell me petrified wood, but I'm scared. #help #indoorhusband #tweetsbychad
#nationwide I'M ON YOUR SIDE. I'd be happy to be an accident in your next commercial. #selloutatfirstchance
Live tweeting in two hours.
I'm gonna live tweet Super Bowl. After never watching a game this yr. & then drunk tweet. Commercials skipping halftime show. #SuperBowlXLIX
Bruce Jenner transitioning into a woman. Uh, I thought it was complete. What's with all the obvious come outs. We know. #celebritycloset
Oh before you complain about the half time show. Yes I can believe what happened & it's not that bad or controversial. SHUT UP #HalftimeShow
This year I'm betting on commercials. I bet there will be Doritos, Pepsi, Bud, and a car commercial. #superbowlcommercials
Just tweeting around today. See ya.