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Best Drunk Tweets!

When the lecture started 7 minutes ago but Amy & Beth from Theta Apple Pie won't shut up about their weekend
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When everyone says you're lucky to have your girl but they don't know how crazy she really is
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"This edible ain't shit" *45 minutes later
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Rain drop, drop top! Haha I love listening to y'alls music, I'm Becky by the way
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John Legend performing at the Oscars (2017)
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me: did u bring the goods drug dealer: of course
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When you lose your mom at the store
Cop: Am I Pronouncing This Right, Ping Pong? Girl: It's Lisa Cop: Ok Sushi
(Taco Bell drive thru) Me: can I get some extra mild sauce Cashier: sure Me:
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when she introduces herself to your boys as your girlfriend, but you've only been dating for 9 years
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"Trump is paying $85 an hour to build the wall, wyd?" Me:
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You vs the guy she tells you not to worry about
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Trump: The less immigrants we let in the better. Pence: The fewer Trump: Shhh, don't call me that in public yet.
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