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Brandon Zingale

Byerie Irving and LeGone James
Who would've thought that a hot dog wearing headphones would take over the world.
Friend: Hey man I completely forgot I owe you $30 Me: ehh... don't worry about it. Friend: Are you sure!? Me: No, pay me my damn money.
Rob Lowe thought he saw Bigfoot, but it was just Crazy Hairy Rob Lowe from the DIRECTV commercial.
Things I've done while being #Deadtired @mysleepscore. Submit yours for a chance to win a trip to NYC + $500! fbit.co/4rmy #sp
David West just gave Tristan Thompson mono.
Hey @Walmart, you guys sell the freshest buns hands down.
It's the weekend! Remember, you can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning. #OldMil 🎥 by@BrandonVineer
Retweeted by Brandon Zingale
Big shoutout to the people who never give up on chasing a piece of paper in the wind that only moves when they try to pick it up.
1990: I hope there are flying cars in the future! 2017:
Her: I'm cheating on you. Him: You can save a ton of money on your car insurance by switching to Geico. Her: I'm still cheating on you.
*Spots @dylanminnette * Me: Hey man you're Clay from 13 Reasons Why! Dylan: Yup that's me. Me: Nice! Dylan: Well, I should get to class.
Come listen to my playlist live at 2pm EST on the @vertigoislive app! Link to download is in my bio. #sp #Vertigoislive
Every year I get excited for the Browns to draft. Its like watching the 1st movie of a trilogy, hating it, then getting hyped for the next 2
Today is my birthday. My ID Says 27, but my hairline says 40.
I'm giving out Spotify Premium gift cards to a few lucky listeners tonight! I'll be going live on @vertigoislive in 2 hours! Link in bio.
We must stop these criminals.
Is "asking for a friend" just a way for people to ask a question and make it seem like someone else asked it? Asking for a friend.
I will never be able to put away multiple pieces of Tupperware successfully.
I'm giving out Spotify Premium gift cards to a few listeners tonight! Going live on @vertigoislive in 2 hours! bit.ly/2o7dspP #sp
Who remembers this movie?
You stay classy, Cleveland.
*pulled over by cop* Cop: Did you know that your tags are expired? *tags cop* Me: You're it! Cop: Me running away: Renewed!
I'm surprised Pixar hasn't made a movie about Snapchat filters yet.
Best purchase I've ever made.
When you're at a department store and walk by the fragrance associate...
A ghost's first haunting. Had a blast playing with #Lomics App 🚀😄 If you want to create a story like mine - download th@lomicsapppp Evj
You can't make this stuff up.
Homeless man: Spare some change? Me: Sorry I only have a card. *Pulls out iPad with square reader* Homeless man: You were saying?
So that's what he's up to.
One of the most genuine and likable people in all of sports. We lost a legend today. Rest in peace, Craig Sager. #SagerStrong
Whenever someone asks me "Is everything okay?" I respond with "No, I am a Cleveland Browns fan."
Guy: Hey do you know Twenty One Pilots? Other Guy: I've only flown once so I only know one pilot. His name is Doug. He is very nice.
Little-known fact: Bear mugs make coffee taste 43% better 🐻☕️2
Joe: I did it Barack: Did what? Joe: Installed an airbag in the Oval Office chair Barack:
When your parents make you sing Christmas carols to the neighbor that handed out veggie chips on Halloween
 
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