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Emmy comedian
238 followers
No matter how many Press-ups a Lizard does, it will never have Muscles.
twacher: convert this sentence into future tense ''i kill a man''. Me: you will go to jail
Akpos complained bitterly to his friend Ochuko after writing the NECO exams: “Na God go punish NECO.”, he cried.... fb.me/4acYzbnZN
He who goes to sleep with an itching anus wakes up with smelly fingers – Nigerian Proverb
A child can play with its mother’s breasts, but not its father’s testicles – Guinean Proverb
The madman, who throws a stone into a crowded market, forgets that his own mother could be hit by his madness. – Ugandan Proverb
If you don’t know where you are going, any road will take you there – Ugandan Proverb
An old lady feels uneasy when dry bones are mentioned in a proverb – Ghanaian Proverb
The frown on the face of the goat will not stop it from being taken to the market – Nigerian Proverb
If the throat can grant passage to a knife, the anus should wonder how to expel it - South-African Proverb
The man who marries a beautiful woman, and the farmer who grows corn by the roadside have the same problem- Ethiopian Proverb
The anus doesn’t teach the mouth the sweetness of food – South-African Proverb
An army of sheep led by a lion can defeat an army of lions led by a sheep. – Ghanaian proverb
No matter how far an eagle flies up the sky, it will definitely come down to look for food – Zimbabwe Proverb
It is only a stupid cow that rejoices at the prospect of being taken to a beautiful abattoir – Zambian Proverb
When a man is stung by a bee, he does not destroy all beehives- Kenya Proverb
While U were vexing cos he cldn't buy U a BB10, another girl was striving to save up for a BB curve so she cld PING him
Did U knw dat if U light a candle under d moonlight & say three times d name of Ur crush,... U'd look really STUPID doing dat??
My neighbour was kidnapped,& a ransom of N30m was demanded OR else they'll burn him. Pls donate Ur fuel,I've donated 3 tyres aidy☹
B4 U hit a girl, tk a minute & imagine Ur dad hitting Ur mum. If dat doesn't stop U, obviously, Ur mum beats up Ur dad
OLD ENGLISH: I haveth thou nothing to say as I faileth to be Intrigued or astonished by thy conversation... NEW ENGLISH: K
What does an ocean do when it's excited?... It waves! Did U sea water did there?... I'm shore U did, stop being a beach
Some debtors are so good at lying, U call them to ask for Ur money, & end up saying "Sorry, tell me if there's anyway I can help"
Some girls will buy A Second Hand BlackBerry, and still they will be Asking "How Did You Get My Pin"...The Former Owner Na GHOST???
I wonder if Tantalizers is still an eatery or a road direction. "If U reach Tantalizers, turn right. Don't enter o, just pass it"