Guys, if you're looking for a paid protester, look no further; I am the best. Please help me RT, my politician may be on your TL.
She got a big booty so I call her Big Booty : one of the greatest quotes of our times
Considering we had a 3 goal lead and a cup final over the weekend, I don't understand why half the players playing today, are #mufc
Reminder that I'll never forgive Looney Tunes for making me think that rabbits were meant to look like Bugs Bunny till I was 25...
Really really miss messing about with Leésa & Riiane, playing with Rüth and teasing Stumpy. #Ad
Me: I swear to God, I'll...
Cat: no, swear to me!
Today's thread is titled
Cry With Me: A series of vignettes told through screenshots
I'm feeling really depressed right now but I swear if 200k enters my account I'll be "I'm in great amazing spirits.'
A message that wouldn't fit in 140 characters.
Man Utd should sell Smalling and buy back Keane... or better yet, offer them an exchange.
Can't be 'liking' pictures of 'crazy bitches' on Instagram anymore, so I go to Facebook & like the Instagram pictures of 'crazy bitches'.
Listen to Sam Feldt - Heartfeldt Radio #57 by Heartfeldt Radio for your Saturday Morning Workout
Michael K. Williams wrestles with a tough question: Is he being typecast? See more: theatln.tc/2lhUM5r #QuestionAnswers
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. He doesn't realise. This is the best day of my life.
Guys, get a girlfriend the trusted way; by moisturising your hands regularly.
Emigration tips: try to pick a place not overrun by idiots... The Moon sounds perfect around this time.
98.9% of the time I have no idea what's going on but I'm 99.9% great at pretending.
"i saw you use the toilet and not wash your hand, mate; it's a nope from me."
Check out Folashade A’s culinary voice at ln.is/www.ice.edu/cu…
. Vote and see who wins scholarships to @iceculinary
Your opinions aren't fact, mate. Get off your high horse.
Only person whose "I'll see you in court" you should worry about is Serena Williams.
Nigeria is polarised between support of past & present governments instead of being united by how both have failed them as a people
Begining to think we're never gonna see Lord Gaga.
TODAY is DDay!
Lets do this!
Lagos. 8am. National Stadium.
Abuja. 9am. Unity Fountain
Wait, Bally is a KD boy? Ai yanzu ya zama dole ye ci kudi din.
'I Stand With Nigeria' Rallies To Continue In Lagos And Abuja Tomorrow.
Hitler - failed painter
Trump - cancelled tv host
Bannon - failed documentary maker
Conway - failed stand-up
Support the arts and media
So much beef in the world now yet not enough burger puns.
A fun way to chop money is karate
If you came to me in 2012 and said "Rhys, you can have vuvuzelas or you can have Brexit and Trump." I'd have said: "What's brexit?"
reminder that you can book a room at a trump hotel & then cancel at the last minute
at the age where if you're incessantly honking behind me, i'll get so irate and mad with rage that i'll do absolutely nothing about it.
The person who once said to me, "there are no stupid questions," also asked me if i'd like to have some fried chicken. Idiot.
If I saw a guy walking down the road dressed as superman, i'll think to myself: "he's obviously crazy," everyone knows superman doesn't walk
He lived his life like a candle in the wind; he was a pretty useless candle.
iRoko TV and chill is just as dangerous if not worse
Just remembered I saw four goats devouring a pizza yesterday... Teeneage Mutant Hero Goats.
I cuddled with your grandma cos hoes keep stealing my shawarma.
RE today's early morning showers: rain that you're not having sex in, is otherwise known as pointless rain
Currently searching the interwebs for a refresher course on How To Tweet Again... You'll know if I'm successful.
Twitter Fingers. WhatsApp Fingers. They're a thing.
You can't say you wholeheartedly know a person till you've seen their Shazam® playlist.
The gym is a great place to go for when you're in the mood to just rub your genitals everywhere.