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Pires
Danny Brown might actually be good, but I'll probably never know. Can't handle more than 10 seconds of his cartoon voice.
There's only so much social media garbage one can look at to kill time, and I'm well aware of the irony of this.
However he's brought a box full of fudge with him & is sharing it with me so I'll let him slightly.
This DJ is killing me with the crap MP3s
There's a Bruce Willis lookalike here with bright red braces & a trilby on, bumping & grinding with each girl in turn. Time of his life.
Warm place? High energy activity?Pale grey shirt? C'mon dude. Get this man some Lynx Africa stat.
Good bit of harmonica pal #mouthorgan #bluesy
Nominated twice, but luckily I have an ample supply of both ice & buckets at all times.
just once i wanna gently close the eyelids of dead guy & not have him say dude i'm not dead we're literally in the middle of a conversation
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So you're just gonna straight up take off your shoes & massage your feet next to me on the bus? Nah, pal.
Actually down to MK Dons. Only the Capital One Cup, but still...ugggghhh.
Arsenal can have Welbeck. Please. Take him.
Guy in the bank called me 'big fella' - do I call him 'little fella' now? Is that for this works? Are we pals now?
The good news is United definitely haven't overpaid for any players this summer.
Fun fact about me: If you don't tell me to "Take care," I won't. I'll drink Liquid Plumr. I'll walk into traffic. I'll put bleach in my eyes
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Turns out not sleeping is bad & makes you do not good things.
skyrockets in flight / backstreet’s back, all right
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Or even a pigeon amongst the sharks.
Girl in a red dress has thrown a cat amongst the pigeons.
Front row seat to speed dating in swing dance form. Placing my bets now.
Swing night tonight, so I guess it means a thing?
In other news, made a huge error tonight #uhoh
On a train with the Secret Cinema crew, who are perfectly blending into a Fri night in Hackney.
Soul all the way from Philly tonight. Top guys. #amarirebel
"And how would you like your steak, sir?" "Probably a lot. That's why I ordered it."
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Clapham Junction station is hell.
This Laura Mvula Proms performance is the nicest thing my ears have had the pleasure of getting wooed by of late. #BBCProms
Praise Jebus, an actual defender coming to United!
Oxford St dawdle rage. Hate world. Revenge soon. Take out on everyone.
& so glad they brought the trophy to Old Trafford just to rub it in.
STRONG START. GOOD.
Why y'all acting like the world just now gettin messed up? What about slavery? The hall of cost? Pick up a book
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Eating a pink lady.
Raiding the reduced section
Love good delayed train. Six minutes of my life lost into the abyss thanks to Southwest Trains.
Way too much Bette Midler for one night. Need beers & meat & DIY & man things.
*puts om roumd glases* haha wowe limke harrey poter ! *rides a traimn* jus lieke harbey pobtre !!! *paremts die* hambrey pabre
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As are The Silver Comet. Top night.
Danny Toeman is awesome.
Drunk skanks kickin' off at an acoustic open mic night? #hackney
More open mic fun #picknmix
*pays for a 9th consecutive lap dance from the same stripper*...so then Sam..get this..he literally PICKS UP FRODO and carries him up the mo
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Trafalgar Sq in the early hours is what I imagine purgatory is like.
Luke Shaw out injured already. This is excellent news & a good sign for the season. I feel good.