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Brad Taylor
"Are you ready to order?" Yes, I'll have the menu. "You... have a menu." Yes, that's what I'll have. - Vegans
Thugs take selfies too.
Never raise your voice, improve your argument.
Medium pizza, chips & Gatorade. $8 at 7/11. No shame.
Damn homie, in high school you was the man homie. Wtf happened to you? - me referring to Lays chips.
Errsher had all the jamz
Girl you make me wanna leave the one I'm wit, start a new relationship with you!
Pros of a date at the movies: 1 Cant talk (u wont say something dumb) 2 Air conditioned (minimal sweating) 3 Dark (they cant see u sweating)
Twitter jail sucks.
Never trust anyone that takes selfies in the shower. Their not focused enough on the cleaning, booty probably still stinks.
The life you want starts when you embrace what you got! Keep improving what makes you unique! Fugg what others thinks of you!
56-0 Like college. They gotta fire someone from Tampa after today.
There's no one more selfish than the person who pulls up in the stall next to you and starts dropping BOMBS. Let me shit in peace, bish!
So Lebron got his hairline fixed foreal?
Bono invaded my iTunes privacy.
Reggae is the greatest.
I resent that my girlfriend calls me "baby." Babies wear diapers and cry and fall over all the time. I only do two of those things.
It's Monday, lemme eat & drink til I'm filthy.
Go straight, make your first right then a left at the light and then you'll be outta my face with that bullshit.
10 years ahead mentally and trapped in todays time.
This chick on Instagram posts so many pictures of her boyfriend I feel like I'm dating him.
Never argue with a person that has a flip phone, their lack of pixels won't allow them to see clearly.
High fived a shit load of people yesterday.
In route to Wilmington for @Calrootsfest with my queen. It's time for Reggae, all day!
I habitually suck at leaving on time.
If you Google "Tilt," the whole screen will tilt slightly. Wtf.
Better to be slapped with the truth than kissed with a lie.
Hungover as fugg, damn! T!t Shake forever!
There's a special place for people who favorite their own tweets.
Kim, do you take Kanye to be your lawfully wedded husband to love and cherish? Kim: I.. *Kanye grabs mic* Kanye: She do
Going downtown tonight to kick ass at #Ingress. This game is so dope!
Calm down, dudes wearing polo shirts like it's a new trend.
Simmer down, sports fans that say "we" when talking about their favorite team.
In Detroit hanging out on 8 mile. My thug just upgraded.
All this Detroit love. Free cookies, nugs, drinks. After party madness!!
I call people with issues Magazine's.
Taking the coffee game to new levels with my new Expresso maker.
Fake people don’t surprise me anymore, loyal people do.
If my nudes ever leaked, feel free to Retweet, Reblog, and Share.
My anaconda would actually still like some even if you lack buns, Hun.
I still don't get why or how lobsters wear bibs but whatever.
I survived dat bish doe...
Breaking the E string on the 2nd song of the set is the worst. No backup bass, just an old pack of strings.
Breffus in bed cause she's dope as fugg
The way to be cool is to not worry about being cool.
"@vacapri: What's a god to a non-believer?" a myth: Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, and the most amazing of all, Santa Clause.
If you ever need someone to talk to, you can call me. I won't answer, but you can call.