If youre bored creating your PowerPoint presentation, everyone else will be bored when you present it.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
HI TWITTERS.... whats happening in your part of the internet today?
What do you get if cross a snowman and a shark? ....... Frost bite!
If dentists make their money off people with bad teeth, why should I trust a toothpaste that 4 out of 5 dentists recommend?
Lulu: No matter how dark the night, morning always comes, and our journey begins anew. #FinalFantasy #videogames
Dear Pringles, I'm no longer a child and cannot fit my hand inside your tubes of deliciousness. Sincerely, Everyone over 7.
You have died of dysentery - Oregon Trail #videogames
Why was the number 10 so scared? Because 7-8-9
I'm a princess in Nigeria and I want you to help me move $500 million out of the country.
That awkward moment when you are actually pulling a push door. HATE THAT
War and Peace would take 21,000 texts.
when someone tries to correct you on something you clearly know more about.
If you ever feel bad about yourself just think about the people who use their selfies as their lock screen or wallpaper.
Twerking should be redefined as "tweeting while at work"
I may not be on Facebook much this week so like your own kids and say happy birthday to yourself.
You were real. That's what made you so good to watch - The Truman Show
Great business Idea: Minding your own...
We should have a way of telling people their breath stinks without hurting their feelings like: "Well I'm bored, let's go brush our teeth."
Invention, my dear friends, is 93% perspiration, 6% electricity, 4% evaporation, and 2% butterscotch ripple. - Willy Wonka
A hero need not speak. When he is gone, the world will speak for him - Halo #videogames
He who laughs last probably made a back-up.
Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue. - Dilbert
The only thing #google
has failed to do so far... Is fail.. ;)
Its lonely at the top... but you do eat better
People who smile before 9am...they can't be trusted.
Playing DayZ with Raptr for the first time. raptr.com/DreamGeekGal?t…
Today's subliminal message is: ( )
Sometimes the simplest idea can make the biggest difference - Pay It Forward
A million monkeys banging on million typewriters will reproduce all Shakespeare?Thanks to the internet, we know this is not true.
Whoever snuck the 's' in "fast food" is a clever person.
Opening a pizza box and immediately searching for the biggest slice.
They call it a Royale with Cheese." Vincent - Pulp Fiction
.. whatcha doing Twitters? I am coding and can't sleep... video game time maybe? :)
The mage draws her two handed sword..... "We're in trouble." #dnd
Weird is just a side effect of being awesome.
Everyone says to follow your dreams, so I'm going back to bed.
When you spell a word so wrong that even autocorrect is like, "I got nothin bro..."
You're weird, I like that. #geek
Half a Dozen, because saying "six" was just too difficult.
Remember, everyone seems normal until you get to know them...
I'd like to swap this empty can for a new SIM Card @PublicMobile @amandablain #SIMSwap
Are you a God?... No..... Then... DIE! - Ghostbusters
People don't understand how lonely it is to be a kid - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Have you tried turning it off and on again? #geek #itcrowd
What do you call a song sung in an automobile? A cartoon.
You'll never find dice that are thrown in anger. #dnd
140 characters ought to be enough for anybody.. -Bill Gates
War. War never changes. #fallout #videogames