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Alan Carr

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So who fancy a summer tune or two all for free at @GrandBrighton tomorrow night buff.ly/11nMzMb #Brighton #Hove FREE #LiveMusic
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I'm trying to help @AlanCarr pick a new hairstyle. Which one suits him best? twitpic.com/cy0ot5 twitpic.com/cy0otf
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@AlanCarr show him this pic an tell him u want business up front, party at the back haha pic.twitter.com/IKFx6qwxDL
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Describing the style I want but stupid hairdresser hasn't even heard of Dog The Bounty Hunter
Just been asked if I want a cup of tea - so far so good
Im doing that on my own!! ha ha RT @Kt_and_Nick: @AlanCarr go bald! for charity
Off to the hairdressers - I want a complete change but nothing off the length
@AlanCarr please RT this it's a charity event we are doing at work for children's hospital in Sheffield please !! RT pic.twitter.com/mbL8jc1lxr
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You're not helping!!! x RT @DoctorChristian: HERPES OUTBREAK? "@AlanCarr: My ears are burning - who's talking about me?"
I tell you who isn't talking about me -the 18 people who didn't know who I was on Pointless *sobs and throws himself dramatically on bed*
Who is talking about me? Answer me - don't make me ANGRY!! twitpic.com/cxrt57
My ears are burning - who's talking about me?
Most people nick the shower caps from hotels I'm thinking of popping that commode in my man bag.
Cheeky!!! RT @helliwellyboots: @AlanCarr bet that's had nearly as much arse as you!
Why not create this look in your home by cutting a hole in your armchair and weeing and pooing through it?
I'm not saying the toilet in my hotel is old, but........ twitpic.com/cxhfps
Just eaten half my dogs Pedigree Chum #revenge
Just arrived home to find that my dogs have celebrated my birthday celebrations early - this WAS my cake!! twitpic.com/cx6mc5
So glad the rug went to a good home!
Thanks for all the Happy Birthday wishes! Love you my little bastards xx
Well I say writing, eating hobnobs and getting easily distrac
Thanks for all the lovely comments about 'Live At The Apollo' had a ball!!! Being a bit quiet at mo on twitter as writing a new tour #sshhh
I would have preferred to have seen the egg throwing in silhouette
I thought Francine did a perfect me!! Well done love xxx
Did anyone else see that?!!! #Bgt
@AlanCarr didn't find a pic of you but found this. wouldn't life be so much easier if this was true? pic.twitter.com/U5pXncpsa1
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@AlanCarr Hi, The S.Times used a pic of you & one of your dogs when launching our campaign #Thebigscoop this weekend. Nice hat!
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Yes i'd left my glasses in Yates - damn x RT @Barbiedoll_1994: @AlanCarr Didn't know you were on Jeremy Kyle Alan :P pic.twitter.com/Nuyml835Os
I'm actually inside a poop a scoop bag as we speak *suffocating face*
There's a photo of me in a newspaper discussing the perils of dog poo. Is this true? I'm wearing a hat if that helps
Apparently I'm the face of dog shit.
I only want a strip wash its not like a proper shower
Stuck behind a caravan in a traffic jam. Is it rude to open the door of the caravan, go in and help myself to their facilities?
Morning all! X
Alan Carr - last seen doing a forward roll out of a moving car to the sound of Sybil's 'When I'm Good and Ready'
Being driven down the motorway - if my mates music doesn't get any better - I'm doing a George Michael!!
@AlanCarr I think that's affiliated with RawBackDoor
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As opposed to Raw To Whore! Where you just get a mini-bus of rent boys turning up at your door
@AlanCarr I'm fundraising for St Barnabas House Hospice in Sussex. Please RT as not doing that well. Thank you justgiving.com/Kelly-Hammond
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@AlanCarr Will we see you at hse of commons today showing support for yr#equalmarriage Were gonna b singing outside @LdnGMC please RT xxx
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I wanted to do Raw to Dior when they just send you haute couture on a daily basis but they didn't have my size
I'm doing @rawtodoor - plus I'm the new face of Adios and want to look my best when I'm strutting down the high street in sequinned hotpants
@AlanCarr PLEEEEEEASE retweet, tryna raise money for a 16 year old lad with a brain tumor thinkingshrinking.co.uk Thank you <3
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Ha ha - you SO think like me! x RT @SCG66: @pauldunphy @AlanCarr but why stop at 1 and leave 2 lonely in the box?!