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Alan Carr

URGENT CHILD ABDUCTION boy believed 6 or 7 yrs. Someone must be able to recognise van or his bike ? Please all RT
Retweeted by Alan Carr
*dusts off milkmaid figurine and Queen Mum commemorative plate*
Let's get this boy back! Have you seen Rosco? Elderly owner completely devastated.
Retweeted by Alan Carr
#mantronix is trending!!! *has flashback to dancing to Got to Have Your Love at the roadmender*
I suggest everyone goes to see @MissJoJoSmith tonight at cabaret Voltaire on Blair street she's my fav comic
Retweeted by Alan Carr
.@AlanCarr is about to start his OZ tour! YAY! 1st stop @canberratheatre Mon 22 Aug! Tix @
Retweeted by Alan Carr
URGENT! I need to know what this filter is!!!! I've never ever looked like I could be in a boy band - until now!
Having a very patriotic pot of tea
This hot mama is furious I stopped her having sex with a really ugly Jack Russell. She'll thank me when she's sober
Retweeted by Alan Carr
When @AliceBrine dances to Wonderwall
Went round Christchurch and found the beautiful old theatre I'm playing at - excited now! (ICYMI I'm in orange)
When you teach @ScottNealUK how to use gifs.......
When I turn up at @ScottNealUK 's house and we have the same outfit on
#IraqOutLoud the #ChilcotReport 24/7 Come to #venue212 & take part You never know who you might end up reading with
Retweeted by Alan Carr
Twitter, you don't know what gunt is?
As they took this photo the airport called my name & yelled at me for leaving baggage unattended.@AlanCarr =terror
Retweeted by Alan Carr
A tray of tequila shots has just turned up and I've got such an early flight tomorrow
Unfortunately this photo of the Wellington Opera House gives the impression I'm performing next to a sex shop 😳p
Can't wait to perform in Wellington tonight!! #yapyapyap
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