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usasocial media 260,377 followers
You should be able to Swipe UP on Tinder as a way of saying "Nah, but your friend is cute."
I will marry a girl who knows how I take my β˜• tea and coffee. And knows when to make which πŸ’–
She knew he'd come. He knew she'd wait.
She : Are you there ? Him : Always for you.
Ellen should give away more stuff like Oprah and rename her show Ellen de Generous
Happy Birthday Ellen. You are my favorite lesbian πŸ’•
People who kiss their family members on the mouth are WEIRD
Trust nobody, not even NOBODY. 🌞🌚
I stole every word of this tweet from a dictionary.
Fuck you. I steal my own tweets. #ThugLife
I don't think Iggy has even visited Berlin or Tokyo
How to handle a girl with attitude😐😭
I wanna know who is recording these little kids do this πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚οΏ½
i thank Lord for puberty everyday
Fake,Scripted,Theatre and Steroids #RoyalRumbleIn5Words
Nothing ruins your Sunday more than realizing it's Monday the next day πŸ˜’
I hate spoiled people who get everything they want
When you needed to fart all day and finally get home πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚οΏ½
'Calm Down' is the worst thing anyone could ever say to another person
People that are unhappy in the morning are annoying AF😐
I will never understand how people can talk so much bullshit and still be convinced that it's 100% true without even thinking
People waited a long time till King Abdullah was dead to tweet about him. It ain't even funny bruh.πŸ˜’πŸ˜’πŸ˜’
Ever been so mad you were calm😑😀😠😐
When I remember a dream am I remembering my dream or what my brain thinks I dreamed?
Its a miracle how they managed to fuck up two and half men so badly! What the fuck happened to Jake?
I swear Two & Half Men is the worst thing to ever happen to tv.
The WhatsAppening is here.
7 + 8 = 10 ~ Windows
I wish people would realize just how annoying they are πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
Waiting for someone who would wait for me
My eyeballs feel like they dilated LOL
It's so0ooo awkward when you can tell a Cat hates you
"#OHIO" must be the shortest word with three syllables.
Its 2015! How come women with fake boobies still dont have the option of what flavored milk they want in them? #GenuineKoschan
Time is one tricky motherfucker
When you check your phone and you got 5 missed calls from your mom
When someone starts a sentence with your name, you know they're serious.
WhatsApp finally comes to your Desktop! Now waiting for the TV version
When you are tired but don't wanna go to sleep 😩😩😩😩😩😩
When you are a kid titties😍 are the most fascinating thing in life. But now as a man its all about that ass πŸ‘Œ
People's relationship goals be hella stupid
Do you ever pretend your life is a comic book lol
What exactly do women with big fat butt do with that big fat butt ?
Man there is nothing more attractive than seeing a girl in your shirt 😳
if you won't text a guy first you are probably 13
My fries could use your salt
The last time Hilary Clinton had a job, she outsourced it to Monica Lewinsky.And you think she will create jobs?