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J A Y K ♛
Want to Grow Your
Social Media, Free?
These Facebook emails "find more friends" are annoying af. I haven't logged onto Facebook in a solid 3 years.
When bored... 1. Open fridge. Nothing to eat. 2. Open pantry. Nothing to eat. 3. Lower standards and repeat.
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EVERYONE IN IDAHO DRIVES LIKE A FUCKING RETARD
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reasons i favorite tweets: 1. ur hot 2. i agree 3. i think ur a complete idiot 4. i know u hate me & i want u to know that i know
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Crazy how fast things can change
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me: *does nothing all day* im so tired
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When you have a tea party at 5 and a football game at 5:30
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Fuck these games. 🙅
jk money is alright.
Money ain't shit, bitches ain't either.
GF: I'm leaving you Me: WHAT? WHY? GF: You're too afraid to take risks Me: [Softening Doritos under a tap before eating them] THATS BULLSHIT
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[God creating a turkey] God: Make it like a shitty brown peacock... Animal technician: Anything else? God: Hang a nut-sack on it's face lol
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Draw me like one of your french girls
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Turtle said "Silence, water horse!" LMAOOO
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Don't be fucking with my youngins
@18_jjohnson send me a link to that make money get turnt song it was fire 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
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*laying prone with a sniper rifle* *sees the target* *about to take the shot* *whispers* "kobe"
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Chief Keef was only 15 when he made "Don't Like" and put the city of Chicago on. twitter.com/whattheffacts/…
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[shipwreck diary] Day 24: found a time machine with a 23 day limit.
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[shipwreck diary] Day 23: the Chinese guy didn't taste anything like I thought he would
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A girl text me "wyd ?" I say "I'm on the toilet doing number 2." She said "ewww wtf." That's when I knew y'all couldn't handle the truth.
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People at Best Buy don't know shit.
Re Twee if you like cabbage Ignore if you want a spider to crawl in your ear and lay his eggs in your head and you can feel them crawling
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haha is it hot in here or is it just me? SATAN: no it should be like that for everyone
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Just a friendly reminder to never skip leg day
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If you're not pissing them off you're doing it wrong.
A male porcupine urinates on the female to let her know that it's time for mating.
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S/o to @Logan_Tentinger @janessa_stell and @18_jjohnson for coming out to the tournament for the "moral support" :) love you guys
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Therapist: do u communicate with your kids? Me: my son stays in his room all day & never speaks Therapist [looks at notes]: the 5 week old?
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if cartoons can wear the same clothes everyday then so can i
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Watching these people is enough entertainment.
people just don't understand how big America really is
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Twitter loads slower now-a-days
i do’nt need firewerkz cuz mai sweg alwais shinez
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Coworker: comin to Lisa's party? Me [sitting right next to Lisa]: is she the one who can't have kids? Lisa [crying]: WHY Me: Im not a doctor
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The store only had SPF 110 sunscreen. It'll have to do.
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Everybody is always late. 😑
"Who the hell is saying gymnastics isn't a sport I don't even do it and I know that it's such a physically demanding/time consuming sport!"
Retweeted by J A Y K ♛




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